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When you met, and then you're hanging out, then sexual stuff happens and she pulls back, you have a short time to gain her attention again, otherwise it's 'Giving her the gift of missing you' big time until she decides what to do... and don't forget to date other girls to help her decide if she wants you.
Dear Rob,
About 4months ago I met a great girl online, we spoke a few weeks and I was cocky and funny, busy but kind and talkative.
She kept asking to meet me and eventually I had some 'free time' to see her. First date went well and we started to date, seeing each other once a week and doing something different, aquarium, zoo ect.... I also tried to be busy the odd day to give her the gift of missing me, it worked perfectly.
Second date we had our first kiss and by the 5th date we spent hours on the grass just kissing. Since then she's stayed round my uni place a couple of times... and I've had lots of positive signals.... example: after a row with my sister I said I wish I had someone like you as my sister and she was like I don't wanna be your sister. She gets jealous of my many girl mates, she constantly says she misses me and she mentioned our future a lot.
However from the start she did say didn't want a relationship atm.... when she came over I asked her out and she said she liked things how they are but after a few months she'd wanna be with me. Since then we have still been close but the comments on the future ect seem to be a lot less....
We would talk for hours online and on msn, though I'd still be the one to leave first.... and I've tried to cut back on this more in order to make her want more... but I'm not sure what to do.... She was abused by her dad as a child and she claims this makes her push people away, but I'm not sure if I'm making excuses for her not... It feels like simply asking her out killed all the attraction id created over the dating process.....
please help :)
Thanks Phil
Hi Phil,
When she puts up the STOP sign it’s time to think back to how your approach to her changed over time, from the first meeting to the last.
How did you treat her differently?
Did you slide back into old wussy behaviors?
Talking for hours and hours on MSN isn’t a relationship builder, it’s way to waste time and you detail too much of your life to a woman.
And now you’re in the penalty box, waiting to get out for whatever infringement you made.
I suggest giving her some space, and in a week or two just invite her out somewhere, go shopping or something.
Not an official date but just to ‘catch up’ with her.
Then wait another week or so before contacting her again.
See how her interest either increases or stays the same or drops… that will be your signal to either try to get closer to her again or that you’ve blown it big time and should remember what you did so you’ll never do it again.
Best wishes,
Rob
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