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When the guy you're dating is live-in and all he does is live off you, move him out, move out yourself, but definitely make some changes and fast.
Dear Rob,
I've been in a relationship for nearly two years.
I feel like I'm being used. My boyfriend doesn't work, never has and spends all his time playing computer games and watching porn.
He even watches it in front of me when I have asked him not to as I find it disrespectful.
I am out at university most of the week so I can't see why he can't do it while I'm not around. He has cheated on me online and lied to me several times.
He earns no money so spends the little he gets on his on games and then expects me to pay for everything.
I bought him a guitar for Christmas last year which he smashed up in a temper and then asked me to buy him another and one sulked when I said no.
He doesn't seem interested in me sexually, says its silly but as I said watches porn a lot.
When we do sleep together he likes to hurt me.
He is physically abusive to but says it's my fault for annoying him, he's even broken my finger.
It's depressing me and getting in the way of my studies and I've tried talking to him but he says its all my problem not his and he can do what he wants.
What should I do, should I get out?
Even when my mother died recently he said I was lying and didn't comfort me until hours later because he was on the computer. Am I making him angry? Is it my fault? Please advise me.
Sincerely,
Lost
Hi Lost,
I'm shocked that you'd even ask the question but yes, break it off with him and do it now.
You have told me a horrible story but one that I am sure many people can relate to.
When one person starts to do all the work and the other takes advantage of this, never accepting any responsibility or care for the other, it's time to move out and move on.
Move out then send him an email. He doesn't deserve the breakup to be in person and it'll be less of a hassle for you.
"Dear BF, you're now my ex. Get your cash from someone else, I'm not going to be around for you to abuse anymore."
You deserve a guy that doesn't watch porn, isn't a bum and respects women. You've wasted two years, don't waste another minute!
The arguments you've had, the lack of sympathy he has given you, this won't be changed by an discussion or argument. Make the drastic step and get your life back.
Keep looking for Mr. Right but be sure to get rid of the Mr. Wrong you're with now.
Best Wishes,
Rob.
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