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In a long distance relationship if the same commitment that existed before sex is not there afterwards, then you know now what his game was.
Dear Rob,
Two month ago I meet the guy.
We felt so good next to each other. He lives in different state. I went to visit him and we spent such a great time. 3 days of happiness and joy. We didn't have sex, we just enjoyed being next to each other.
Then I returned home and we kept in touch every day.
Two weeks later he asked me to come visit him again, because his friend was getting married. I went to visit him again (he even offer to pay for my tickets).
Again we had a beautiful time and we made love. Later on he told me that he was waiting all these weeks to tell me that he loves me, he didn't want to do it over the phone.
I felt the same way; I felt that I found my second half. While I was there we start talking about our future, he told me that he would like to leave together with me, and it doesn't matter for him were. So, we thought that ether me or him will have to move. He even cried when we were talking about having family together.
Then I left and again we were talking on the phone every single day.
He was telling me that he miss me and can't wait to see me again.
And about two weeks from last time we spent time together I noticed that he call less than before. I knew that he just got new job and new contract, that's why I gave him time and space that he needed.
Then I started worry and I feel that we are drafting apart.
So I wrote a text message stating that I feel this way and I want to know that his feelings to me are not my imaginations and that I stayed honest with him and I want to know what is going on between us.
He didn't answer and I waited a few days. Then he called and said that he is very busy with new work, he can't even take a day off and when I asked him what does he think about us he start telling me that he never had a long distance relationship and with this new job he don't think he can move to me.
I asked him that when we were next to each other things looked different? He said yes. So I told him that now we have to decide how we are going to leave from now on, like the way we were before when we meet each other.
He told me that it is not living it is surviving. I got very upset and told him that he can continue surviving but I am going to live my LIFE and hung up the phone.
It's been two weeks we are not calling each other.
I am devastated and hurt. I DO love him and if I would have had to live and go to him I wouldn't think twice. I don't know what to do. Do you think I did something wrong. Do you think there is the way to safe our relationship. Please help.
Cindy
Hi Cindy,
Certainly you had a great romance, but I fear that the bloom is off the rose…
Have you done any personal background information searches on him? I suggest that you do.
It seems to me you met a player and once he had sex with you he didn’t care about you anymore.
Hard lesson learned, I’m afraid.
But in a long distance relationship if the same commitment that existed before sex is not there afterwards, then you know now what his game was.
I don’t think that you did anything wrong except for moving way too fats in this relationship… there are rules for long distance relationships and having sex quickly at the beginning is a big no-no.
Don’t call him again for another week…. If he tries to call you, talk with him… otherwise I am right (which I hope I am not) and he’s just a creep that uses women.
Best Wishes,
Rob.
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