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Ask Rob! The
Advice General
Ask your question at
www.advicegeneral.com
Dear Reader,
Every once in a while
and young teen, or pre-teen, will email me for some dating or
relationship advice.
This is a precarious
situation. I want to be helpful, but I also believe that the first
line of advice for these types of questions shouldn't be a stranger
on the internet. It should be the parents or an older brother or
sister.
Dating and relationships
are tough enough for people out of school, balancing career family
and friends. Never mind the pressures that young people have to deal
with: school, parents, being cool, fitting in. All of that and stir
in passionate feelings of the first love, the first kiss, the first
promises of love forever. It can be overwhelming for someone that is
also dealing with a quickly changing body and raging hormones.
But sometimes I just
can't help myself and I offer some advice. Here is one such email I
answered (edited for clarity):
Dear Rob,
I'm in love with one of my best friends. Except she has a boyfriend
... but the relationship is going nowhere. She says it herself, but
she doesn't want to break his heart. How can I make her know I love
her more than anyone ever will? Please help me. She's the one. And I
can't lose her.
Hi,
Your email tells me that you're young.
And inexperienced as far as dating goes.
I'd stop being such a love-sick puppy about this girl and wait to
date when you're more mature.
For instance, you say that "I can't lose her", yet, she's not yours.
And if she doesn't want to break up with this other guy, but listens
to you moaning about how much you like her... UGH.
Do yourself a favor, stay single, wait for the real right girl to
come along, in a couple of years time.
Best wishes,
Rob
Now, you may feel that
this is a cold-hearted approach for a guy giving advice but we've
all gone through that first breakup, that 'broken heart that will
never heal' stage of life. Someone has to be willing to say "Slow
down!" Life isn't fair and there isn't a pot of gold on the other
side. Well, not always.
Preparation is the best
lead-in for experience. Even when you know that the advice offered
won't be heeded.
The Rules That Your
Too Young To Date
-
Everything you
do revolves around that other person, whether you're dating
them yet or not
-
The
responsibilities and chores that you have at home (while
living with your parents) are too much for you to handle but
you feel that the 'love of your life' and you can do no
wrong together
-
You don't pay
for your own car insurance yet
-
Someone else
still has to buy your beer
-
This week's
'love of your life' is a different person than the last
week's 'love of your life' which is also different from any
previous love you've had
-
Planning your
future together doesn't get beyond the next weekend
-
You can stay out
as long as you want, so far as your parents don't find out
*
Rob is not a professional counselor, just someone that wants to
help. His advice and opinions are his own and should be treated
as advice that can be followed or ignored. He'll give you the
best advice his experience allows. And you'll have someone
that'll listen to your troubles without being too judgmental.
And if you don't like his answers, just delete them! *
Disclaimer: ©2006-2007 AdviceGeneral.com. If you
want advice, find out more about Rob at:
www.advicegeneral.com
This article and any articles published by "Ask Rob! The Advice General" are
for entertainment purposes only. For complete terms and limitations please
go to:
http://www.advicegeneral.com/terms-of-use.htm
 Need
to find out when to kiss her the first time? Read "the Kiss
Test" available in "Double Your Dating" by David DeAngelo.
For young guys just starting to date, this book is a must-read.
You'll learn how to increase your confidence in asking girls
out, in getting emails and phone numbers. How to ask for that
first date and know when to get that first kiss.
Guys can
build confidence in all types of relationships. 'Double Your
Dating' is highly recommended.
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