This Article: No two are the same but generally they are made of the same stuff, it’s only the riverbed of life that has either smoothed down their edges or broken them up into the wrong type of man.
Men are like rocks in a river bed:
Some are nice and smooth from years of rolling around and smoothing
themselves from many sudden encounters;
2. Some are smooth but have many sharp edges from bumping up against other rocks and breaking;
3. Many are smoothed over from traveling great distances, smoothed from a lifetime of rolling down the long riverbed but broken, smooth in places, sharp in others.
These rocks all have the same things in common:
They were all at one point in their lives, the early part, very rough. A variety of experiences has altered the appearance and the behavior of the rocks, inside and out.
We can attribute each of
these rock elements to the attributes in men:
1. The nice and smooth men are those that have dated many women but are basically loners. They don’t stand out from a crowd and to date them, women have to be the aggressor. These men harbor no ill will towards women but cannot always be truly themselves. They start every relationship in the “puppy-love” stage but soon become overly clings and possessive. Some of these men become controlling and abusive, mentally and/or physically. They have a long history of short relationships.
2. The smooth but with some rough edge rocks have had a successful past with women but are now finding themselves changing. They are becoming open to women’s feelings and more importantly her needs. He does believe in love and he understands that love and commitment go hand-in-hand and he is willing to work along that path to find the happiness he deserves. He has not had many relationships but when he was serious with a woman the relationships lasted a long time.
3. The third type of rock is the attention-getter, he has had a less successful time dating women in that he has goals in mind but does not have the ability to find people that share his goals with. He cannot be decisive with anything that does not directly affect him and he is often the loudest of any group in an effort to stand out from others, hoping beyond hope that she will notice him, the target of his happiness but when she sees him she is put off by his jerk-style of behaving, his feeble attempts to draw attention towards himself as he tries to force attraction on those around him. This man is found in most groups as he is uncomfortable being alone, not having a crowd to protect his insecurities.
Yes, men are like rocks.
And the key to finding your true rock is how you approach men.
If you are happy with going after the attention-getter (the third rock), realize that he only needs you as arm candy. He’s used to travelling around and is not always comfortable in any relationship for a while. He does have goals but they are only concrete in his own mind, he cannot fully explain his goals to others nor can he make sense of them as he speaks about his goals. His vagueness is enticing at first but tiresome after a while.
Eventually women realize that this man has not grown up, is only play-acting the role of an adult. Tips to look for are: an over-attention to possessions; wears nice clothes but they are not ideally suited for him, the clothes would hang better on someone else; his job offers not much advancement and he has had many jobs, likely in the same career path but has changed them often. He does not share easily, does not offer a helping hand but often forces those around him to be available for his own needs.
Should you find yourself with the first type of rock, the smooth rock, beware of his possessiveness. You will find him shallow with deep moments of thought about esoteric things; he attempts to understand and change things he cannot change and barely understands; he will follow your lead, let you decide on what to do and where to go but will hold inside him a jealousy, a demon of rejection that will flare up without notice when he is denied something important to him; his jealousy will grow to surround you like a dark cloak, shutting out the light of friends and family, trapping you into his life only; after a while you no longer have the lead in the relationship, you have been isolated by his (to him) love and will become desperate in a ways to end the relationship and his power over you.
It is the second rock that women need to find. This is a man that has not been overshadowed by parental control, he does not compete with other men and yet is proud of his own accomplishments; he easily takes the lead of your relationship but not by force, only because he is comfortable in the choices he makes and he always plans for your happiness as well as his own, knowing that both of your goals can work in unison; he is comfortable with himself and easily inspires those around him to honesty and openness, as a spreading pool of light in a dark room. This man understands that men and women are fundamentally different and he does not use these differences to advantage, he takes them as part of life’s lessons and moves forward through troubling times, not cracking, keeping charge of how life wears him down, confident that no breaks to his personality will happen, no rough edges will be exposed.
Attraction to this type of man is not always
“love at first sight” and can usually be found to be someone that is
relied on to take charge without forcing those around him to be his
puppets. Women are often shocked by not seeing this type of man in
their lives because they were blinded by the other rough-edged rocks
out there. But there he is, revealed, once you know what to look for
in a man.
And to know how to find that man, the perfect rock for your life, I recommend that you read the ebook: “Catch Him and Keep Him – a woman’s guide to finding Mr. Right... and keeping him hooked for good”.
Thanks for reading and best of luck in life and love.