Answer this for me:
Where does your understanding of men come from?
Have you learned about men from family experiences, how your father and mother got along? Did you learn from older sisters and brothers? Books? Schools? TV? The internet?
Does your knowledge of men come from some place where men are champions and conquerors and women are submissives?
You must realize that all of this is very, very wrong.
Men are not conquerors, they are afraid of women. Women do not need to be submissive when they hold so much power over men.
You only have to understand this fact to be able to control the power of love in your life and how it is shared with men.
You can see how a guy that wants to attract you makes the same moves and speaks the same way repeatedly because what he did at first is what he assumes caused you to be attracted to him so it is related until he feels more comfortable with you, then he relaxes, or he tightens up, he becomes friendlier or he becomes more controlling.
Let's think of communication as a skill that is not completely understood until we are middle-aged.
As babies we first mimic, then model, our communicating, that is how we are taught. Repeating words, then modeling them (creating strings of words) to communicate what we want.
Even into our teens we mimic and model communications. We adapt words, meanings and slang with our peers that is usually quite different from our parents and adults.
But this communication is not universal. It is not understood by everyone and as we relate to the opposite sex we are stranded by the few ways we can communicate our feelings, our trust and our love. The words are not yet fully understood to be able to express our true feelings without being superficial or seeming to be selfish.
One thought in this direction is why teens are so sexually active; they cannot fully communicate together so sex is an equalizer that allows for what is not able to be spoken can be communicated.
Consider how stunted your communications were with your first boyfriends. The basic inability for him to understand you, and how he could not communicate love to you that you could understand with the exception of "puppy love" and infatuation. Love that was so overwhelming and so misunderstood. Love on so many levels, growing deeper in power all the time. The teen years were quite confusing.
Consider now how love grows or how you now have control over love that you offer, it is still love, it is still overwhelming but it is not so naive any longer.
You have grown and your communication skills have improved.
And with all of this your knowledge "the power you have over men" is still not fully recognized.
If you understand what door I am opening up for you, then you should consider fully walking through this door to increase your knowledge of men and the true power you have that is not yet fully revealed.
I urge you to continue along with these three excellent writers, join their newsletters (free registration required) and explore this world that is opening up for you.
Have a wonderful love life!
- Robert Lee
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