Affection or Attraction. Which is it?
There's something I find very strange about human behavior...
In fact, it's something that seems to be at the very root of all our major personal problems in life, especially when it comes to dating women.
Yet we tend to ignore it altogether.
And that's what makes it so strange.
Here it is:
When we don't understand how to become successful at doing or getting something, we tend draw conclusions about the people who can.
And what's even stranger is this:
Because we don't understand the reason why they succeed where we fail and in our attempt to make sense out of it, we also tend to come up with our own reasons why we can't... and why they shouldn't.
But there's just one problem with this...
Most times, the reasons we gives ourselves for why others succeed when we don't AREN'T even real.
We only MAKE THEM REAL because we justify them to ourselves over and over again... until we believe in them so strongly that we stop questioning them.
And then what happens?
They prevent us from doing or getting what we want.
So the ONLY person they hurt is ourselves.
In fact, this is exactly what stops guys from becoming successful at meeting and dating women. They have all the reasons why they CAN'T... instead of looking for the reasons why they AREN'T.
There's HUGE difference there.
And the reason they aren't good at meeting or dating women is because they believe in a handful of major myths about women.
These myths stop men cold in their tracks!
So here they are:
Women Are ONLY Attracted To Tall, “Good Looking” Guys
This is probably the biggest myth about women and there's actually a logical reason for it... and that's what can make it so tough to figure out.
We obviously know that us men are attracted to women based on their physical appearances, right?
But because of this, what do we do?
Don't we tend to assume that it's also the same way for women?
Don't we assume that what attracts a woman to a man is also his physical appearance?
And if a guy's "average" looking, short, or thin or fat, isn't it safe to assume that he doesn't stand a chance with women?
Maybe you've even heard something like this before:
"Women are only attracted to tall, dark, handsome men with chiseled physiques or big muscles... and that's the reason why women will never be attracted to me."
Well, guess what?
There are tons of model looking guys out there who are terrible at dating women. I've met many. So if it were true that women only go for looks, why are there male model type guys who have problems dating women?
And guess what else?
There are also "average", even "ugly" guys out there who are great with women.
But there's a reason for that.
Here's the real secret:
Good looks will grab a woman's attention. There's no doubt about it. But that doesn't mean that she's going to "feel" anything "romantic" about him as you'll see later.
Women ONLY Want Rich, Famous, Or Otherwise “Powerful” Men
Let me ask you this:
If there's a woman you're interested in or attracted to, do you really care about how much money she makes or whether or not she's famous or "well-known"?
Would that stop you from wanting to date her?
Unless you had ulterior motives or your lifestyles were so different that it cased a major clash, probably not.
Wouldn't her personality be much more important to you?
I mean, what if a woman was rich and famous but you didn't find her the least bit attractive... would you still want to pursue her?
Maybe you would — if were looking for someone you could "use" for just their money or their connections.
But if you were looking for someone who you "clicked with", I'm willing to bet there's a good chance you wouldn't have the slightest interest in her BECAUSE of her money or fame.
Well, it's the same with women.
Most of them are looking for men, whether they're consciously aware of it or not, who they feel attracted to.
Of course, there are women who get together with guys just to progress their careers or to use for his money.
Golddiggers are a reality.
But you know what?
These women are a very small minority. And why would you want to date someone like this when their are plenty of women who aren't so selfish out there?
Women REALLY Want To Be “Friends First”
How do most guys approach dating?
Generally, don't they first try to "befriend" a woman they're interested in and then try to turn her into their girlfriend after they've gotten to know her?
But isn't this a good approach to take?
I mean, I'm sure you've probably even heard a woman say that she wants to be friends with a guy first... and then see where it goes from there?
And I'm also willing to bet, if you've ever browsed any online dating profiles that you've seen many women write this in their profile.
But if you shouldn't be "friends first" with a woman, why do women say that's what they want?
There's a simply answer:
This is just a PRECAUTION they take to prevent themselves from getting into a "sticky situation".
It gives them an "easy out".
Here's what I mean:
Let's say a woman's interested in a guy, but she doesn't know him very well yet. And from experience, she knows that some guys get attached very quickly, which becomes a nuisance to her.
So what does she do?
At the very beginning she says, "Let's be friends first."
That way, if she later discovers that the guy gets really clingy and annoying, she can just remind he that she wanted to be friends.
This way he can't blame her for HIS insecurity problems.
But on the other hand, if you're the type of guy who understands why women are attracted to men and you treat them accordingly, they won't want to be "just friends" with you.
Women Want A Perfectly Respectful “Gentleman”
If you're like the majority of men out there, whenever you find yourself interested in a woman, don't you tend to see yourself in somewhat of a "provider" role?
Here's what I mean:
Don't you generally see it as your DUTY to pay for her whenever you take her out on a date?
Don't you often see it as your DUTY to drop any plans you may have to help her whenever she has a problem?
And don't you sometimes see it as your DUTY to go out of your way to do her favors or cater to her every whim?
After all, isn't that what it means to be a perfect "gentleman"?
Isn't that what it means to be respectful to women?
Well, do you want to know how women REALLY view men who act this way and treat them like this?
Do they view them as gentlemen?
They see such men as "gentle" men who have NO self-respect.
And why do they have no self-respect?
Because they give women a higher priority and value in their lives than THEMSELVES.
So instead of knowing he deserves a woman, he feels like he has to continually prove to her that he's worthy of her.
And you know what?
A woman can't trust or be honest with a man who doesn't place the focus of his own life or himself... because everything he does is designed to get her approval, which is VERY UNATTRACTIVE to women.
Women Are Stupid For Dating “Jerks” Instead Of “Nice Guys”
This is the real paradox, isn't it?
Why do women so often go for "jerks" who seem brainless or even mean? They can be emotionally and physically abusive, but somehow that doesn't stop a woman from staying with him.
Are women just too stupid and can't see that these "jerks" aren't good for them?
Can't they see they're not being treated with respect?
I mean, is there something wrong with women?
Or could it possibly be that they're just acting on their nature as women?
What do I mean, exactly?
Well, maybe you've heard this:
"Women just can't see what a "good" guy I am. It's their fault that I'm single. Women are just too stupid to know a decent guy when they see one."
I used to think along these lines, until I came to a realization:
Maybe there's ANOTHER reason why women go for "jerks" instead of "nice guys".
Just maybe I'm missing something.
It was true... and here's what I discovered:
Women actually have very little choice but to want to get together with "jerks"?
In fact, they have about as much choice over this desire as we do when we see a swimsuit model. It's instinct, right? We see a woman with a great body and immediately we're attracted.
Well, the truth is, "jerks" trigger a similar kind of attraction mechanism in women. But we'll get deeper into that later.
Women Don’t Enjoy Sex And They See It As A “Chore”
I think we're all familiar with this story:
A man and woman lay in bed... and the man wants sex. So he starts makeing some advances, trying to initiate things.
And how does the woman respond?
"I have a headache."
And we all know these are just excuses women use when they don't want to have sex, right?
But what if the man persists? How does a woman respond?
Well, she may get so irritated by his persistent "nagging" that she finally decides: "Okay, I'll just let him boink me and get this over with. Then he's finaly leave me alone."
Now, imagine that this becomes the "norm" to this guy. What would he assume about women and sex?
That it's a chore?
It's an obligation?
Women don't enjoy it at all?
But you know what? Something's missing here:
In these types of situations, the woman wasn't aroused. I mean, do you want to have sex when you're not aroused?
Let's say you just had an orgasm? Do you want go at it again immediately?
Simply because you're not turned-on.
But where a man can't have sex unless he's aroused, a woman CAN... but that doesn't mean she WANTS to.
So because most men don't know HOW TO arouse a woman, they assume that sex is a chore for all women... when really it's just a chore for women with men who don't understand how to arouse them.
Women ONLY Have Sex In Steady Relationships
What has to happen before a woman sleeps with a man?
Do you know WHAT that is?
Does he have to go through some long, drawn-out courting process where he proves that he's "worthy" of the woman he's interested in, by showing her that he would make a good partner?
Does he have to demonstrate how much he loves a woman before she will have sex with him?
Some think so.
But if that were true, why do women have one night stands?
If a man had to "prove" himself by making an elaborate "courting display", no woman would ever sleep with a man until months after meeting him.
But one night stands happen all the time.
In fact, someone's probably having one somewhere, right now.
See, the truth is a woman will sleep with any man AFTER he communicates certain things to her.
Some men just KNOW how to communicate these things in a very SHORT PERIOD of time, like an evening. While other men don't know how to communicate these things at all.
And that's why it takes so long for a woman to sleep with them — if it even happens at all.
The reason for this is that they try to convince a woman to have sex with them by "courting" them, which is a "made-made" idea.
But in Nature, it works COMPLETELY differently.
Here’s A Closer Look: Affection vs. Attraction
What does a man have to communicate to a woman in order for her to feel "sexually attracted" to him and want a "romantic relationship" with him?
And why doesn't the way most of us were taught work?
Here's the bottom line...
Whether we're aware of it or not, there are two "emotional states" all us men try to create in the women they want:
AFFECTION or ATTRACTION
And here's the difference:
AFFECTION causes a woman to look at a guy like a friend who she just wants to hang-out and talk with. Guys cause a woman to feel affection by being "nice" to women.
If you do this, YOU HAVE NO CHOICE — but to be friends with a woman.
ATTRACTION causes a woman to look at a guy as someone she wants to get "sexually involved" with. Guys cause a woman to feel attraction by doing the things I teach.
And if you do this, WOMEN HAVE NO CHOICE — but to want to pursue a "romantic relationship" with you.
It's actually pretty simple.
You'll learn all the ADVANCED concepts and techniques inside.
FIRST, it'll teach you the exact steps to stop yourself from causing women to feel affection for you.
SECOND, it'll show you everything you need to know about what causes a woman to feel attraction for you and exactly how to do it:
I look forward to meeting and talking with you in the forums.
See you there soon.