Dating After Divorce
Your Guide To Quickly Getting Back Into "The Dating Game" After A Divorce Or
Breakup
By Ken Kennedy
www.Double Your Dating.com
Making the move from single guy to
married guy to single guy again is, to say the least, a wrenching
experience.
And what makes it hardest is actually relearning how to meet women and start
dating again.
Take a breath and look around. Look out your window, open up your front
door, and take a long hard look outside:
The world hasn’t changed, just YOUR world has.
Step by step you’re going to take charge of your single life again.
Meet women, date women, show the world that you’re available again.
One of the unhealthiest things guys bounce into after divorce is throwing
themselves into their work or taking on a hobby that excludes others.
Solitary punishment isn’t a healthy move. Overworking and intense creation
of something that only you can admire isn’t the best way to make your first
steps into the dating world again.
And it’s not a great use of your time either.
Now then, since we’ve identified two bad habits lets go forward with two
good habits:
Take a walk at least once every other day, after work, before work, whatever
time is good for you. Not a long 5 mile jog, just a short walk around a
couple of blocks. Get comfortable in your neighborhood surroundings.
Familiarize yourself with the real benefits of your neighborhood, whether it
is a welcoming coffee shop, an ethnic restaurant, or just open spaces.
And number two, if you don’t read a novel regularly, now it’s time to start.
Regular reading opens yourself up to your imagination beyond what the
occasional movie or television show will do for you. Start with a top ten
fiction list and pick an interesting title. Set aside some “book time” to do
after your every-other-day walk time. This will help to clear your mind,
settle your body into a more comfortable routine, and yes, help get mind and
body into better physical and psychological shape.
I don’t care if you’re overweight, skinny; have the middle age spread or
whatever. These two exercises, walking and reading, are the basics of
getting body and mind to work together, separate from the excesses of work
and intense, solo hobbies.
Walking gets you out. Reading takes you in.
Walking gets you interactive with others. Reading gives you perspective and
yes, even conversational practice. Personally, I’ve never read a book that I
didn’t discuss with someone, somewhere. Even years later a scene in a book
will come to mind during conversations while at a party, out for a coffee,
wherever. And it’s always great conversation fodder.
When you’ve gone through a breakup or divorce it’s only natural to seek
comfort in friends. And you lose some friends just as the division of
property took things away.
We are men, me adapt and move on.
To be successful beyond this time of your life requires a change to your
basic routine.
Give my suggestion a try for the next two weeks.
Sunday, find a top ten fiction novel.
Suggestions:
Order it and get ready to start reading regularly once it’s delivered.
Monday, walk out your front door. If you normally turn right to get to your
car, walk right along the block. Keep going until you’ve identified at least
three places of interest whether they be a shop, a bakery, a newsstand,
drugstore, bistro (you get the idea) of places you’d like to stop into.
Wednesday, go for another walk. Around the block and stop into one of those
stores. Buy some fresh fruit. Get a cup of coffee. Buy a newspaper from a
different city or state. Go home and read the paper. Have your coffee. Make
yourself a snack with the goodies you purchased. Pull out your book and read
two chapters and end your night.
Friday, start your walk (be dressed correctly for the weather) at your
preset time. Stop again in the sops you last stopped in. Say hi to whoever
is working, introduce yourself as new in the neighborhood, at least now
you’re a new customer, hopefully becoming a regular. Do this in all the
places you stop at. This introduction exercise will create some “comfort
zones” for you, away from your home and outside of work.
Saturday you have a free day. Maybe you have a family obligation. House
cleaning/upkeep work to do, whatever your regular Saturday routine is, do
it. Unless it’s being hung over from overindulgence from Friday night.
You’re Friday night and your weekend nights shouldn’t be spent in an alcohol
induced haze. Not any more, at least during the next two weeks, half of
which you’ve already completed.
Sunday is a partial free day. Maybe you have church services to take in.
Maybe you have sports on TV to watch. Good enough, let’s not break your
whole lifestyle. But Sunday you will take a walk. Maybe no stops in the
stores, no gazing at the building architecture, but maybe you will stop in,
get a coffee, say “Hi” to someone working that you know their names. Good
for you, good for your confidence.
Monday is walking and reading again. Start your walk by turning the opposite
way this time. See what is new from the left side of your front door. Buy
another newspaper from another state. When you get home, do read another
couple of the chapters of your book.
Tuesday all you have to do is take the out of state newspaper with you to
work.
Wednesday is walk day again. Make the time. Have someone join you if you
like. Company on a walk is nice, allows ideas to be traded. Remember, this
isn’t exercise on the body as much as it’s clearing the mind. After the walk
and you’ve sent your company on their way, have a drink of something and
pull out your book again. Read through the next few chapters.
Thursday is a free day. Do your usual routine. Work. Play. Relax.
Friday is the second last day of this two week routine. Go for your walk.
Buy a coffee or a newspaper again. Say hello to those you’ve met. A nice
casual walk. Read a couple more chapters of your book.
Saturday is a free day, you’re choice of what to do today. Clean the house,
wash the car, do some laundry. The usual household chores.
Sunday is your choice day. Do you continue with this program? Has giving
yourself some set time to walk and read over the past couple of weeks been a
hardship? Or have you actually managed to find over the last two weeks that
you’ve expanded your comfort zone? You’ve introduced yourself to your
neighborhood and had some action outside of you house’s four walls.
It’s up to you to decide how you’ll spend this Sunday and the rest of your
days.
And to expand on your new single man life skills I urge you to visit
“www.Double Your Dating.com”.
To your future,
Robert Lee
500+ Dating Service Reviews 