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Getting In Shape To Date Again

Dating After Divorce - Your Guide To Quickly Getting Back Into "The Dating Game" After A Divorce Or Breakup By Ken Kennedy www.Double Your Dating.com

Making the move from single guy to married guy to single guy again is, to say the least, a wrenching experience.

And what makes it hardest is actually relearning how to meet women and start dating again.

Take a breath and look around. Look out your window, open up your front door, and take a long hard look outside:
The world hasn’t changed, just YOUR world has.
Step by step you’re going to take charge of your single life again.
Meet women, date women, show the world that you’re available again.

One of the unhealthiest things guys bounce into after divorce is throwing themselves into their work or taking on a hobby that excludes others. Solitary punishment isn’t a healthy move. Overworking and intense creation of something that only you can admire isn’t the best way to make your first steps into the dating world again.

And it’s not a great use of your time either.

Now then, since we’ve identified two bad habits lets go forward with two good habits:

Take a walk at least once every other day, after work, before work, whatever time is good for you. Not a long 5 mile jog, just a short walk around a couple of blocks. Get comfortable in your neighborhood surroundings. Familiarize yourself with the real benefits of your neighborhood, whether it is a welcoming coffee shop, an ethnic restaurant, or just open spaces.

And number two, if you don’t read a novel regularly, now it’s time to start. Regular reading opens yourself up to your imagination beyond what the occasional movie or television show will do for you. Start with a top ten fiction list and pick an interesting title. Set aside some “book time” to do after your every-other-day walk time. This will help to clear your mind, settle your body into a more comfortable routine, and yes, help get mind and body into better physical and psychological shape.

I don’t care if you’re overweight, skinny; have the middle age spread or whatever. These two exercises, walking and reading, are the basics of getting body and mind to work together, separate from the excesses of work and intense, solo hobbies.

Walking gets you out. Reading takes you in.

Walking gets you interactive with others. Reading gives you perspective and yes, even conversational practice. Personally, I’ve never read a book that I didn’t discuss with someone, somewhere. Even years later a scene in a book will come to mind during conversations while at a party, out for a coffee, wherever. And it’s always great conversation fodder.

When you’ve gone through a breakup or divorce it’s only natural to seek comfort in friends. And you lose some friends just as the division of property took things away.
We are men, me adapt and move on.
To be successful beyond this time of your life requires a change to your basic routine.

Give my suggestion a try for the next two weeks.

Sunday, find a top ten fiction novel. Order it and get ready to start reading regularly once it’s delivered.

Monday, walk out your front door. If you normally turn right to get to your car, walk right along the block. Keep going until you’ve identified at least three places of interest whether they be a shop, a bakery, a newsstand, drugstore, bistro (you get the idea) of places you’d like to stop into.

Wednesday, go for another walk. Around the block and stop into one of those stores. Buy some fresh fruit. Get a cup of coffee. Buy a newspaper from a different city or state. Go home and read the paper. Have your coffee. Make yourself a snack with the goodies you purchased. Pull out your book and read two chapters and end your night.

Friday, start your walk (be dressed correctly for the weather) at your preset time. Stop again in the sops you last stopped in. Say hi to whoever is working, introduce yourself as new in the neighborhood, at least now you’re a new customer, hopefully becoming a regular. Do this in all the places you stop at. This introduction exercise will create some “comfort zones” for you, away from your home and outside of work.

Saturday you have a free day. Maybe you have a family obligation. House cleaning/upkeep work to do, whatever your regular Saturday routine is, do it. Unless it’s being hung over from overindulgence from Friday night. You’re Friday night and your weekend nights shouldn’t be spent in an alcohol induced haze. Not any more, at least during the next two weeks, half of which you’ve already completed.

Sunday is a partial free day. Maybe you have church services to take in. Maybe you have sports on TV to watch. Good enough, let’s not break your whole lifestyle. But Sunday you will take a walk. Maybe no stops in the stores, no gazing at the building architecture, but maybe you will stop in, get a coffee, say “Hi” to someone working that you know their names. Good for you, good for your confidence.

Monday is walking and reading again. Start your walk by turning the opposite way this time. See what is new from the left side of your front door. Buy another newspaper from another state. When you get home, do read another couple of the chapters of your book.

Tuesday all you have to do is take the out of state newspaper with you to work.

Wednesday is walk day again. Make the time. Have someone join you if you like. Company on a walk is nice, allows ideas to be traded. Remember, this isn’t exercise on the body as much as it’s clearing the mind. After the walk and you’ve sent your company on their way, have a drink of something and pull out your book again. Read through the next few chapters.

Thursday is a free day. Do your usual routine. Work. Play. Relax.

Friday is the second last day of this two week routine. Go for your walk. Buy a coffee or a newspaper again. Say hello to those you’ve met. A nice casual walk. Read a couple more chapters of your book.

Saturday is a free day, you’re choice of what to do today. Clean the house, wash the car, do some laundry. The usual household chores.

Sunday is your choice day. Do you continue with this program? Has giving yourself some set time to walk and read over the past couple of weeks been a hardship? Or have you actually managed to find over the last two weeks that you’ve expanded your comfort zone? You’ve introduced yourself to your neighborhood and had some action outside of you house’s four walls.

It’s up to you to decide how you’ll spend this Sunday and the rest of your days.

And to expand on your new single man life skills I urge you to
watch this video
To your future,
Robert Lee

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