Carlos Xuma of
Dating Dynamics author of 'The
Dating Black Book'
Click here to find out more ...
Do you know about the RULES for men? Do you
want to know how to counter her tests and games?
Do you know where to touch women to give them the chills and turn them
on to you? Do you know when to touch them? Do you know how to interpret
a woman's questions and interests, and turn them in your favor?
Do you want to stop shooting in the dark with your dating and finally
get some understanding of women? Some real tangible results?
It's tempting to wing it. It really is. Some guys think that they'll
"Figure women out" when they get to a certain point, except that point
never comes. Different women seem to want different things. (Or maybe
they're the same things?) It's too damn confusing.
It doesn't have to be anymore.
THE DATING BLACK BOOK breaks this strategy down in its entirety, from
preparing to meeting to passing their tests. It's the most complete
strategy out there. I'll even tell you how to interpret their behavior
and figure out which kind of woman you're dealing with - and most
importantly, how to avoid the bad ones.
"Ever heard of fear factor? Thanks to you pal, I
got none. Put that in your testimonials. ha,ha. You rock, man! You are
an answer to my prayers. I mean that literally."
I like to start out with reader applause. It gives me a warm fuzzy.
***************************
Have you busted her balls today?
A lot of the Tease to Please technique requires an understanding of a subtle
concept that all of us have used at some time or another. It's called "busting
her balls" (or a more gentle version is "yanking her chain.")
I'm Italian, and one of the hallmarks of our ethnic upbringing (as well as
growing up on the East Coast) is that you learn that everyone wants to bust
your balls. Everybody likes to try and trick you into believing something, or
getting you to feel a little foolish for your gullibility. It can seem like a
cruel tactic, but it does toughen you up a bit, as well as make you think for
yourself.
The best example of busting balls (and the most harsh) is from the movie "Goodfellas."
There's a famous scene where Tommy DeVito (Joe Pesci) and Henry Hill (Ray
Liotta) are in a restaurant after hours, and Joe Pesci's character stops the
conversation in mid-laughter to ask Henry what he meant by a comment. "What do
you mean, I'm a funny guy? What makes me so funny? Am I a clown?" The
situation gets very tense because Tommy looks serious, and Tommy is a bit
psycho. Henry starts to back down, getting a little scared. Then Henry figures
out that Tommy is just pulling his chain, and they all get a laugh.
When I first saw this scene when the movie came out, it sent a chill down my
back. It was EXACTLY how people in my family (and my friends) would clown
around, and it has a VERY humbling affect. I don't suggest you ever take it to
this extreme, but you should definitely study the movie to see what the
dynamic of this is.
To do this with a woman, you must be much more gentle, but the situation is
much the same.
- You say something to her that could be interpreted as serious, but you are
really joking.
- You let her think you're serious for a short period
- You then let her in on it for a sheepish laugh
It's a form of teasing, pure and simple.
It takes some refinement to know when and where to stop, but it works WONDERS
with especially attractive women who are used to getting their own way and
manipulating men. You want to strip away this pretense as soon as you can, and
busting her balls is how you get there.
QUESTION:
I thank you for a great book!! I read it through several times. You have
mentioned that in our society sex is acceptable within 3 or 4 dates.
What happens if she doesn't give it up during that time. Also, you
believe that patience should be the way to go for seduction and
confidence to work but how about the time frame of those 3 or 4 dates
issue. -D
----------------
Very good question.
Keep in mind, I said sex is acceptable on the 3rd or 4th date, but not
GUARANTEED. And that schedule is only good if you've been doing the
right things to engage her trust and attraction. Let's look at your
terminology- "Give it up." That makes it sound like something you're
prying from her fingers.
The situation to shoot for is to have her trying to pry it from YOURS.
It's a cognitive shift that will give you more understanding of your
overall attitude.
If a woman is not giving you what you want, take a look at why. Are you
taking the right steps?
- Progressing along the Dating Continuum
- Not pestering her for sex
- Stimulating and teasing her enough to drive her passion up
And are you making the situation MUTUALLY beneficial? What's in it for
HER?
You MUST do these critical things for a woman to want to go to bed with
you.
Remember, it will ALWAYS be on her timetable, but you make it appear to
be when YOU are ready to give it up. Some women do take longer, and the
3-4 date rule is by no means carved in stone. If things are moving
steadily forward, and you're both happy with the pace and progress, keep
it up. Don't be afraid to turn up the heat a notch or two to get her
attraction and passion burning.
Click here to find out more ...
Carlos Xuma
www.datingdynamics.com
This work is copyrighted by the author. No
unauthorized duplication or presentation allowed. Copyright © 2003-2008,
Dating Dynamics Publications. All Rights Reserved
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