Carlos Xuma of
Dating Dynamics author of 'The
Dating Black Book'
Do you know about the RULES for men? Do you
want to know how to counter her tests and games?
Do you know where to touch women to give them the chills and turn them
on to you? Do you know when to touch them? Do you know how to interpret
a woman's questions and interests, and turn them in your favor?
Do you want to stop shooting in the dark with your dating and finally
get some understanding of women? Some real tangible results?
It's tempting to wing it. It really is. Some guys think that they'll
"Figure women out" when they get to a certain point, except that point
never comes. Different women seem to want different things. (Or maybe
they're the same things?) It's too damn confusing.
It doesn't have to be anymore.
THE DATING BLACK BOOK breaks this strategy down in its entirety, from
preparing to meeting to passing their tests. It's the most complete
strategy out there. I'll even tell you how to interpret their behavior
and figure out which kind of woman you're dealing with - and most
importantly, how to avoid the bad ones.
Dear Carlos,
I am interested in dating this girl whom has
separated from her husband of 2 years (he left). First, a couple of
explanations; I did not cause this break up, she is neighbor of my
cousin, she also knows me through work, we are in the same field but
work at different businesses. This timing is perfect if she would only
say yes, but I don't know how much time someone needs after a split up
of marriage (which has been rough, from what I hear) and how would I go
about asking her out without looking like a piranha waiting for the next
meal. We talk from time to time about business or stupid stuff, but
never about her personal life. This is someone whom I had a interest in
ever since I laid eyes on her and would never forgive myself if never
pursued her.
-------------------
Well, it always comes back to that "special woman," doesn't it? Every
guy has a woman he's been infatuated for so long that he'd sell his
mother into slavery just to get her.
This, guys, is the power of daydreaming, and how it works against you.
By thinking about a woman and fantasizing about her (as every man does
about that 'special' one), you create a magical image of a woman, a pure
white light of feminine glory that cannot be touched by reality. When
you let your mind wander and dwell on her, you create a very wimpy "I'll
do whatever it takes to get you - even sacrificing my dignity" attitude
that comes across when it comes time to really go and get her.
You wind up so intimidated by her, and so afraid you'll mess this one
up, that you end up coming across as too nice and too gentle. It's no
wonder most women end up saying, "Gee, I wonder if we just can't stay
friends!"
Gag.
Barf.
I would actually recommend you do not go after this woman quite yet.
Especially if you'd like to stand a chance at anything more than
grief-sex with her. (Because, quite frankly, that's all you'll get right
now - and only if you're lucky enough to be over at her house when she
has her moment of weakness.) She'll be looking to shore up her
devastated sense of self-esteem from this marriage, and I can guarantee
you that she won't be ready for a new guy. She needs to HEAL.
Now, two years isn't that long, but it all depends on how she approached
the marriage.
PLUS, he dumped her. Not good. She's a wreck. She won't be dating
material for at least 6 months AFTER the divorce is done, much less
while she's only separated. (Which I hope you realize means she's really
still married.)
Okay, so you really want to get her?
REEEEEALLY?????
Will you do what it takes, even if it goes contrary to what you may have
formulated in your head as the perfect "I'll sweep her off her feet"
plan? Will you do what you MUST do, not what you WANT to do?
Okay, then.
Here's what you do:
1) Go out and meet at least ten different women in the next couple
weeks. BEFORE you even think about going after this woman. Date them.
Get your dating life in balance and your attitude on straight before you
do anything.
2) Stop caring what it "looks like." It only looks that way to you,
because you're intimidated by her. Get over it. You're not a piranha.
3) Start contacting her OCCASIONALLY, but don't go asking her if she
needs a shoulder to cry on, or tell her if she ever needs to "just talk"
you're there for her. I'm sure she has a support structure with her
family and female friends. I know you said you don't talk to her about
"personal stuff" and that's great, but she'll eventually get around to
pulling you into her dark whirlpool of sadness and despair. You'd just
wind up sitting on the couch watching bad chick flicks while she cries
over her loss.
4) Treat her like any other woman you would like to date: You tease her
and have a little fun with her, and you NEVER let her feel that bland,
neutral sensation that you are just another "friend." Get her sexual
attraction in gear. Show her some indifference and a lot of seductive,
charming ATTITUDE. You're going to have to risk not having her if you
want to have her.
5) Get out there and date some more, and get this woman out of your
mind. She's going to be damaged goods for quite a while. You may score
some sex in there by just hanging around and being there at the right
time and the right emotional dip, but it's not what you want to have
happen if you want a lasting relationship with her later on. (Not to
mention what a whipped puppy you'd have to be to lurking around to catch
her at a weak moment.) Let her get her rebound out of her system with
SOMEONE ELSE, as painful as it may seem to you to see it happen. Trust
me, any relationship she has in the next few months won't last. She
might even be holding out some hope of reconciliation.
What you see is opportunity in her husband's departure, but it's the
wrong timing. You'd only be a rebound for her, IF even that.
Whatever you do, if I hear that you sat her down and told her your "true
feelings" for her in a desperate bid to step into her soon-to-be-ex's
shoes, I'll come over there and make you watch "Top Gun" or "The
Breakfast Club" a couple times so you can see what attitude women are
really attracted to. (Yeah, that's right... "The Breakfast Club" shows
you the "attitude.")
Sorry to be so harsh...
No, wait a second. I'm not sorry.
This is tough-love, man.
You can take it.
And, while you're at it, you need to find
that zone and attitude that will tell her (by actions and words) that
you're a man she needs to have in her life. You do this by maintaining a
hot and healthy dating life.
There are so many mistakes to be made in the dating world, and most of
these mistakes YOU WON'T EVEN KNOW THAT YOU'RE MAKING. Until it's too
late.
You take Kute Krista to dinner and a movie, thinking you'll go for the
kiss and then ... she hugs you and tells you "I just want to go really
slow. I'm not ready for a relationship." And she goes home right after
the movie after telling you what a great guy you are. You're left
standing in front of the theater with a much lighter wallet and a case
of Dry-Crotch as you wonder where you lost her. How did this happen?
I've spent years dating women, analyzing and breaking down what was
happening, and discovering that there is a key DYNAMIC between men and
women. There are specific behaviors you can use that will increase your
success in meeting and dating women a hundred times more than what they
are now. They're all simple to learn, and they don't involve a special
hypnotic code word.
Some of the things you'll learn in The Dating Black Book:
* High-performing men and their qualities
* Overcome the de-motivators in meeting women and increase your success
ratio
* From crippling behaviors to success
* Developing both your Inner Game and External Game
* Recognize the Loser's Psychology and avoid his evil power
* The one secret source of all your dating pain, and how to stop it from
affecting you
* Dispel your "Male Guilt" and turn it into power
* What "Challenge" really is, and how to use it
* The Three Essential Dating Traits - and how to develop them for
yourself
* The Two Desire Factors a woman must have for you, and how to build
them
* Overcome the toughest hurdle in meeting women - getting her phone
number
* Reverse the Downward Spiral
* Triple your success with the D.O.W. Principle
* The Confidence Treadmill - the secret to developing your
Self-confidence
* The critical behaviors of successful men, as well as the critical
self-destruct mechanisms
* Male role models – what and how to observe and learn from them
* Stop throwing money away on "low-rank" prospects
* Develop a complete dating strategy, including your Objective Desire
Plan
* Online Dating and how to use it
* Problem women - recognize the specific types
* The Program Woman - how to spot her and handle
* Avoid the top dating mistakes
* Power Points - Tally your strengths for maximum benefit
* Secrets behind the Myths of the Nice Guy, the Jerk, the Natural
* Understand "compatibility"
* The Principle of Truth, and how it will increase your success with
women
* The Dating Continuum explained - the architecture of relationships,
from start to end
* Where to meet women (for real)
* The right things to say to women (with examples at each stage)
* Maintain your posture and command respect
* Attitude adjusters - Keep your mind on track
* How to handle arguments, and what is happening beneath the surface
* Talk to women, without having to memorize scripts or hokey seduction
patterns
* The psychology of dating: What women want
* What women really mean when they say "...."
* Female tests and traps
* The secrets of dating persuasion
* Kinesthetics - exactly where, when, and how to touch her
* How to Really Please Her In the Bedroom!
Every guy has a woman he's been infatuated for so long that he'd sell
his mother into slavery just to get her.
Download my books, read them, review the strategies, and
put it to work for you right away. If you don't feel
that it's the incredible, insightful, and invaluable
tool I've made it out to be, you can simply ask for a
refund.
I wrote them in a simple, easy-to-use format that ANYONE
can learn. Nothing is complicated, and there's no dumb
hypnosis routines to learn. Just the stuff that will
help YOU get more success with women. E-books are easy
to read, and they're easy to search for certain points
you want to refer to over and over again.
Here's the complete catalog of what we offer...
www.datingdynamics.com/ebookstore.htm
Use the Advanced Audio Coaching to help you build on that knowledge
and take your success to the extreme. Imagine having a coach giving
you tips, strategies, and a complete breakdown on how to improve your
technique and success with women - first hand.
You can listen to this audio RIGHT NOW on your PC or Mac, and you can
even use your MP3 player to take the learning and go mobile. Put it on
your i-pod!
The monthly audio series is over 100 minutes of advice and explosive
tips, and it's available for download at:
www.datingdynamics.com/audioprog.htm
Is there ANYTHING else worth learning more than how to be successful
with women?
Thanks...
Carlos Xuma
www.datingdynamics.com
This work is copyrighted by the author. No
unauthorized duplication or presentation allowed. Copyright © 2004,
Dating Dynamics Publications. All Rights Reserved
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