Don Diebel: How To Overcome Your Shyness

Help your buddies score with women: Forward this column to them

The following is a guide to use in overcoming your shyness with single women at nightclubs. Follow these steps and you can overcome your shyness and start picking up women instead of standing on the sidelines watching other men meet, approach, attract, pick up, and seduce women in nightclubs.

One of the biggest roadblocks to a shy man in picking up women is fear. Fear that he will be rejected, fear that he won't know what to say, and fear that he won't know how to act.

Believe me, there is nothing to fear but fear itself. Fear and anxiety will produce distinct psychological consequences and if there's anything that's going to hinder your success in picking up single women; it is going to be fear.

The fear of being rejected by a woman can paralyze your attempts to pick up women. Accept the fact that you're going to get rejected some of the time. Just because a woman rejects you it does not make you worthless. There can be many different reasons why a woman may not be interested in you at any given moment. Most of these reasons have little or nothing to do with you as a person. Being rejected by a woman is just a risk you will have to take and if a woman does reject you, it's not the end of the world.

Keep this in mind if you get rejected by single women at a nightclub. No matter how many women are not interested in you, you must remember there are many other women at nightclubs, many of who would be delighted to know you.

To overcome these fears and pick up women, you have got to approach it like you would if you were going to jump in a cold ocean to go swimming. Hurl yourself into it. Take action!

You have got to practice at picking up single women. Sure, you'll get rejected a few times. We all do. So what if you get rejected. You may never see her again anyway. By practicing, you'll build up your confidence. Also, by accepting the fact that you're only practicing picking up women, the pressure to succeed won't be so great.

Has this ever happen to you? You see this beautiful woman that you would love to meet, date, and have an intimate relationship with. You try to build up your nerve to approach her and you make up an excuse not to approach her like, "I'm too scared" or "I'm too nervous." Pondering, stalling, postponing, reconsidering, these are all delaying tactics that impede action. If you find yourself telling yourself these lies and making excuses, block them out of your mind immediately and take action and approach that woman right then and there. Don't waste any time or you'll see one woman after another walk right out of your life. Don't delay trying to pick up a woman or you might find yourself delaying all your life and depriving yourself of romance with hot & sexy single women.

Get rid of the idea that people are always watching you, sizing you up and evaluating you. The only people who do this are shy people who spend a lot of time fearing that they are being evaluated negatively. The reason you think you are being watched is because you do this to others.

The solution to breaking this habit is to stop judging and sizing people up and you will stop thinking that others are doing the same to you. Don't worry about people evaluating you unfavorably, because the reason for this is that they think they are better than you are.

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