This article: "The central point is that you don't have to follow a relationship rule book to make any type of relationship work."
There's a girl I liked a few weeks ago. We dated a while ago but just kind of drifted apart and broke up.
Well, I was pretty thrown by the whole break up because I just didn't see it coming, I didn't understand what she was feeling about me.
I was frustrated by it but I got over her and moved on. After the breakup we did have a talk and decided to remain friends.
After I read your book I finally did understand what had happened between her and I. I saw myself as the "needy" and "wussy" guy that turns women off rather quickly and I hated myself for being like that.
I was determined to change and I worked on myself as you wrote about. Then I decided to see if I really could be the C&F type of guy so I tried these things on her.
I want to say thanks. She can't get enough of me now, but I know to keep her wanting more and add some mystery to our new relationship.
I've read your book a few times now and each time I see something I didn't before.
When you start to understand the psychology of women, then you have an advantage over most other men: they refuse to believe that women can be understood, that a guy can interact with women and still be his own guy, not accountable to her emotions, her needs and her actions.
Not to say that you should hold yourself above what the woman you are dating needs from you, but as shown in 'Double Your Dating' you have to give yourself permission to not get caught in her web of needs that will bring out the wussy in you.
It's ok to:
- not call her every day
- not answer an email right away
- answer her text message in an hour or two
"Dating" is a period of getting to know each other in more depth, it is not an ownership title that is automatically given to her or received for her.
If you're ready to commit, great. If you want to just date, and I don't mean just one woman but a couple or a few, then you need to not seem to commit to her too deeply. It's the small things listed above that change how she sees you and your relationship. And will allow the relationship to get deeper or stay in a "friendly dating" place.
The central point is that you don't have to follow a relationship rule book to make any type of relationship work, as long as you understand what you want out of any particular relationship.
And you have to be able to make the connection between dating, sex, relationships and how you interact with women so that you can stay comfortable about what you are doing and why you are doing it.
Wussies try to follow a relationship rule book, but the rules are what they "need" to do, not what they should be doing.
Wussies need to stay in constant contact with the woman they are dating, or think they have a good chance of dating; wussies need to constantly talk about their feelings and seek approval from the woman they want to date, or are dating.
Wussies tend to "tire" women out by their constant neediness.
Wussies are not in "control" of their emotions, so their emotions control them.
Wussies are always afraid that the woman leave them, and yet they push the woman away by their smothering actions.
If you find yourself, that when you're dating or trying to date a certain woman, that you cannot think of anything but her, you're in too deep to actually control how your dating will turn out with her. And she will sense that you are not in control so she knows that she will be in control. And quickly you will lose her attraction (if it existed) and interest (if there was any).
Here are a couple of things you need to do, starting right now:
- when you meet a woman, be interested in her, but work on her being interested in you
- don't call, email or text any woman immediately back and don't call, email or text first on more than one day in a row
- introduce yourself to one new woman every day
- read a great book about dating advice for men
These may seem like big steps but once you have read "Double Your Dating" you'll see that they are baby steps.
When you can "put yourself out there" then you not only become more independent but you become comfortable taking risks with women and more of what a woman wants in a man.
...and watch it in action, learn it, and use it.
Talk to you soon,
People that read this article also read:
(c) Robert Lee and Cheerful Attitude Web Design Ltd. and David DeAngelo Inc. All Rights Reserved. By accepting and reading this article you agree that: You understand this to be an opinion and not professional advice, it is only to be used for personal entertainment purposes, you are solely responsible for any use of the ideas, concepts, and content and will hold all harmless. Article may not be reprinted without express written consent of the authors.