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David D: I often talk about the concept of ATTRACTION, and why it's more important than anything else when it comes to being successful with women and dating.
The reason is simple:
If a woman feels no ATTRACTION for you, then she's not going to want to be anything other than FRIENDS with you.
There are a couple of exceptions:
1) If she wants something from you
2) If you've pursued her for so long that she finally "falls into affection" with you - and decides that you're probably marriage material
There are probably other exceptions, but these two cover about 99.97873% of the situations you'll run into.
The bottom line:
If you want to a woman to be more than FRIENDS with you, then you're going to need to trigger ATTRACTION inside of her (another great benefit is that you will be more in control of the direction of the relationship, too).
Well, one of the amazing aspects of ATTRACTION is that it can be TURNED UP. You can actually AMPLIFY an initial attraction... if you know how.
Of course, if you DON'T know what you're doing, you can also DESTROY a woman's attraction to you as well (without realizing it). This happens a lot more often than you might think... as most men don't have any idea when a woman is attracted to them.
Also, if you don't know how to AMPLIFY ATTRACTION, then you're most likely GOING to destroy it whenever you do accidentally create it.
I'd like to talk to you about two important concepts when it comes to AMPLIFYING attraction. You may have heard me mention them before.
Here they are:
1) TWO STEPS FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK.
2) NEVER LET THE LINE GO SLACK.
It's kind of hot that they rhyme, too.
So let's talk about these two concepts and how you can use them to amplify and accelerate this wonderful physical and emotional state called ATTRACTION inside of women.
TWO STEPS FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK
I realized a few years ago that women don't get "turned on" the same way men do (duh). I know, I know... I'm not so bright. It's pretty obvious.
But, more importantly, I learned that men get turned on like "light switches", and women get turned on more like "volume knobs".
A man can go from being not interested in sex to completely ready and totally turned on in about 30 seconds. Hell, it's probably more like 3 seconds. Or .3 seconds.
Women, on the other hand, usually start out with a spark of attraction, and if the situation goes the right way, she gets more and more turned on... to the point where she's ready to have sex.
This can happen relatively quickly, but it usually takes HOURS.
One technique you can use to actually AMPLIFY any initial attraction that a woman feels is to use the technique that I call "Two steps forward, one step back".
This simply means progressing a little bit (like maybe kissing her) and then stepping back for a little while (maybe leaning back and holding her hand or not touching at all)... and then moving two steps forward again (maybe kissing her, then kissing her neck)... and stopping again... and so on.
This builds up anticipation. It makes her think about what's happening... and want it more and more. Women love to be given a little bit, then teased... so they are waiting in anticipation of what's going to come next. Of course, since you keep taking a step back each time, it even amplifies the anticipation and sexual tension further.
Now, a MAN wouldn't usually say "do this a little bit, then stop and tease me so I want it more". For most men, this sounds like a foreign concept unknown in these parts.
Crazy talk, even. But not for women.
If you doubt me, find the nearest attractive woman and read her what I just wrote. And watch her face between paragraphs.
You'll see. And you just might learn something.
NEVER LET THE LINE GO SLACK
Once you start to "get" how this process of women getting turned on works, you're going to need a way to gauge how fast or slow to go... and to keep a woman interested without turning into a WussBoy who calls her 10 times a day.
I call this concept "Never let the line go slack".
Imagine that you are holding one end of a rope, and the woman is holding the other end. Both of you are pulling gently... enough to keep TENSION in the line.
It's a little game.
If she starts pulling, you need to give her a little bit of slack... but not so much that she gets it all. And if she starts letting go, you need to pull a little more to take up the slack and keep the TENSION up.
This is a great metaphor for the concept of SEXUAL TENSION.
Most men haven't the SLIGHTEST IDEA IN THE WORLD what sexual tension is. But ALL women know what it is...
Sexual tension is a key to success with women.
So imagine that you're out with a woman for the second time.
On the first date you held hands and kissed, and on this date you're walking around in the mall together.
Let's say you've been teasing her a little bit, and she's been hitting you and saying "stop it!", but she's laughing so you know that she's having fun.
Further, let's say that you've teased her so much that you can tell that it's actually starting to get to her. Maybe you were teasing her about her shoes being ugly, and she stops after the tenth joke and asks "Wow, do you really think my shoes are that ugly?"
At this point, she's letting go of the line a bit... and you need to do something about it to keep the tension up.
So you might say "Oh, no... they're not that bad... I'm just giving you a hard time".
At which point she might say "Wow, good. I was starting to worry that you really hated them and that it was bothering you".
And now you have the opposite situation... both of you are letting the line go slack at the same time with this whole "No, I think your shoes are fine" and her saying "Oh, I'm glad you were just teasing me" thing.
So you have to do something!
You might say "Well, if worse comes to worse you can always donate them to the Salvation Army so a needy girl who doesn't care if her shoes are ugly can have them".
You'll probably get hit, but it puts the tension back in the line again!
Of course, there's an art to doing this correctly, and you will improve with practice.
You can use this in just about every area imaginable, from how often you call a woman to being able to tell when it's appropriate to give a compliment (and then say something to take it back in a funny way!).
The problem is that most guys let things go too far in one direction... they call every day for a week instead of letting the woman call them back a couple of times, and waiting a couple or a few days to call.
Or they hang on a woman's arm every minute when they go out together, rather than giving the woman some space and letting her come find him.
Or they give a woman a compliment, which the woman appreciates, then they start giving her one after the other after the other... which comes across as ULTRA WUSSY KISS ASS BOY... and drives the woman away.
Don't do to much of anything... and never let the line go slack for too long!
When you use these two concepts together, you will find that not only will a woman become FAR more attracted to you, but she'll STAY THAT WAY for as long as you want her to.
If you DON'T do these two things, then you're probably going to find that women will do things that make no sense to you, and they'll RARELY want to be anything more than "just friends", because they just don't "feel it" for you.
I have some more valuable advice for you.
If you're reading this stuff and thinking to yourself "I really need to
learn more about this"...
because you'd like to be more successful with women... then I agree 100%!
Consistent success with women isn't ACCIDENTAL.
You might "get lucky" once in awhile because you're in the right place at the right time... or because you find a girl that just happens to be feeling as need as you...
But consistent, long-term success with women is the result of
UNDERSTANDING how attraction works for women... and then being able to
trigger it and amplify it.
...and with that, I have to recommend that if you’re reading this right now, and you haven't gotten your own copy of my ebook, then you need to do it.
I've spent the last several YEARS figuring this stuff out and then creating systems to teach other guys how to be more successful with women and dating.
honestly believe that ANY man can increase his success with women... and that in most cases a guy can have DRAMATIC success by just UNDERSTANDING how women think and what they respond to better.
In other words, just "getting it" will create success by itself... no fancy techniques needed.
...and watch it in action, learn it, and use it.
Talk to you soon,
Guys that read this article also read:
- Make her feel massive sexual attraction
- A man's guide to the seduction and sexual enchantment of women
(c) Robert Lee alovelinksplus.com, and David DeAngelo Inc. All Rights Reserved.