David D.'s Dating Advice
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*** Keep
Her Attracted ***
I often talk about the concept of ATTRACTION, and why it's more
important than anything else when it comes to being successful with
women and dating.
The reason is simple:
If a woman feels no ATTRACTION for you, then she's not going to want to
be anything other than FRIENDS with you.
There are a couple of exceptions:
1) If she wants something from you
2) If you've pursued her for so long that she finally "falls into
affection" with you - and decides that you're probably marriage material
There are probably other exceptions, but these two cover about 99.97873%
of the situations you'll run into.
The bottom line:
If you want to a woman to be more than FRIENDS with you, then you're
going to need to trigger ATTRACTION inside of her (another great benefit
is that you will be more in control of the direction of the
relationship, too).
Well, one of the amazing aspects of ATTRACTION is that it can be TURNED
UP. You can actually AMPLIFY an initial attraction... if you know how.
Of course, if you DON'T know what you're doing, you can also DESTROY a
woman's attraction to you as well (without realizing it). This happens a
lot more often than you might think... as most men don't have any idea
when a woman is attracted to them.
Also, if you don't know how to AMPLIFY ATTRACTION, then you're most
likely GOING to destroy it whenever you do accidentally create it.
I'd like to talk to you about two important concepts when it comes to
AMPLIFYING attraction. You may have heard me mention them before.
Here they are:
1) TWO STEPS FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK.
2) NEVER LET THE LINE GO SLACK.
It's kind of hot that they rhyme, too.
So let's talk about these two concepts and how you can use them to
amplify and accelerate this wonderful physical and emotional state
called ATTRACTION inside of women.
TWO STEPS FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK
I realized a few years ago that women don't get "turned on" the same way
men do (duh). I know, I know... I'm not so bright. It's pretty obvious.
But, more importantly, I learned that men get turned on like "light
switches", and women get turned on more like "volume knobs".
A man can go from being not interested in sex to completely ready and
totally turned on in about 30 seconds. Hell, it's probably more like 3
seconds. Or .3 seconds.
Women, on the other hand, usually start out with a spark of attraction,
and if the situation goes the right way, she gets more and more turned
on... to the point where she's ready to have sex.
This can happen relatively quickly, but it usually takes HOURS.
One technique you can use to actually AMPLIFY any initial attraction
that a woman feels is to use the technique that I call "Two steps
forward, one step back".
This simply means progressing a little bit (like maybe kissing her) and
then stepping back for a little while (maybe leaning back and holding
her hand or not touching at all)... and then moving two steps forward
again (maybe kissing her, then kissing her neck)... and stopping
again... and so on.
This builds up anticipation. It makes her think about what's
happening... and want it more and more. Women love to be given a little
bit, then teased... so they are waiting in anticipation of what's going
to come next. Of course, since you keep taking a step back each time, it
even amplifies the anticipation and sexual tension further.
Now, a MAN wouldn't usually say "do this a little bit, then stop and
tease me so I want it more". For most men, this sounds like a foreign
concept unknown in these parts.
Crazy talk, even. But not for women.
If you doubt me, find the nearest attractive woman and read her what I
just wrote. And watch her face between paragraphs.
You'll see. And you just might learn something.
NEVER LET THE LINE GO SLACK
Once you start to "get" how this process of women getting turned on
works, you're going to need a way to gauge how fast or slow to go... and
to keep a woman interested without turning into a WussBoy who calls her
10 times a day.
I call this concept "Never let the line go slack".
Imagine that you are holding one end of a rope, and the woman is holding
the other end. Both of you are pulling gently... enough to keep TENSION
in the line.
It's a little game.
If she starts pulling, you need to give her a little bit of slack... but
not so much that she gets it all. And if she starts letting go, you need
to pull a little more to take up the slack and keep the TENSION up.
This is a great metaphor for the concept of SEXUAL TENSION.
Most men haven't the SLIGHTEST IDEA IN THE WORLD what sexual tension is.
But ALL women know what it is...
Sexual tension is a key to success with women.
So imagine that you're out with a woman for the second time.
On the first date you held hands and kissed, and on this date you're
walking around in the mall together.
Let's say you've been teasing her a little bit, and she's been hitting
you and saying "stop it!", but she's laughing so you know that she's
having fun.
Further, let's say that you've teased her so much that you can tell that
it's actually starting to get to her. Maybe you were teasing her about
her shoes being ugly, and she stops after the tenth joke and asks "Wow,
do you really think my shoes are that ugly?"
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At this point, she's letting go
of the line a bit... and you need to do something about it to keep the
tension up.
So you might say "Oh, no... they're not that bad... I'm just giving you a
hard time".
At which point she might say "Wow, good. I was starting to worry that you
really hated them and that it was bothering you".
And now you have the opposite situation... both of you are letting the line
go slack at the same time with this whole "No, I think your shoes are fine"
and her saying "Oh, I'm glad you were just teasing me" thing.
So you have to do something!
You might say "Well, if worse comes to worse you can always donate them to
the Salvation Army so a needy girl who doesn't care if her shoes are ugly
can have them".
You'll probably get hit, but it puts the tension back in the line again!
Of course, there's an art to doing this correctly, and you will improve with
practice.
You can use this in just about every area imaginable, from how often you
call a woman to being able to tell when it's appropriate to give a
compliment (and then say something to take it back in a funny way!).
The problem is that most guys let things go too far in one direction... they
call every day for a week instead of letting the woman call them back a
couple of times, and waiting a couple or a few days to call.
Or they hang on a woman's arm every minute when they go out together, rather
than giving the woman some space and letting her come find him.
Or they give a woman a compliment, which the woman appreciates, then they
start giving her one after the other after the other... which comes across
as ULTRA WUSSY KISS ASS BOY... and drives the woman away.
Don't do to much of anything... and never let the line go slack for too
long!
When you use these two concepts together, you will find that not only will a
woman become FAR more attracted to you, but she'll STAY THAT WAY for as long
as you want her to.
If you DON'T do these two things, then you're probably going to find that
women will do things that make no sense to you, and they'll RARELY want to
be anything more than "just friends", because they just don't "feel it" for
you.
I have some more valuable advice for you.
If you're reading this stuff and thinking to yourself "I really need to
learn more about this"...
because you'd like to be more successful with women... then I agree 100%!
Consistent success with women isn't ACCIDENTAL.
You might "get lucky" once in awhile because you're in the right place at
the right time... or because you find a girl that just happens to be feeling
as need as you...
But consistent, long-term success with women is the result of UNDERSTANDING
how attraction works for women... and then being able to trigger it and
amplify it.
...and with that, I have to recommend that if you’re reading this right now,
and you haven't gotten your own copy of my ebook, then you need to do it.
I've spent the last several YEARS figuring this stuff out and then creating
systems to teach other guys how to be more successful with women and dating.
I
honestly believe that ANY man can increase his success with women... and
that in most cases a guy can have DRAMATIC success by just UNDERSTANDING how
women think and what they respond to better.
In other words, just "getting it" will create success by itself... no
fancy techniques needed.
And if you'd like an introduction to my main concepts and to learn the
basics of how to be more successful with women and dating, then go right now
and download my eBook "Double Your Dating". It comes with three bonus
booklets that are priceless... and CRITICAL to your success with and
understanding of women. It's all at:
www.doubleyourdating.com
- just follow the 'ebook' link and download your copy. This book and the
three bonuses that come with it are the FOUNDATION for success with women.
Everything you read in these articles will make more sense once you have
read the book.
...and read it, learn it, and use it.
Talk to you soon,
David D.
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the free Double Your Dating newsletter and read more advice articles
P.S. As you can probably imagine, I get a TON of email... So if you'd like
to send me a Success Story, Question, or Comment, follow these guidelines:
1) Keep it short and to the point. Two paragraphs max.
2) Tell me what's working for you before you ask your question. I appreciate
all of the "Your stuff is great" and "I don't need to tell you how well your
stuff works" comments, but the fact is that I DO need to hear all of the
specifics... because this helps other guys to see what's working in
different situations.
3) If you have a Success Story, write "Success Story" in the subject line of
the email. I read these first.
4) At the end of the email, give me your initials and tell me where you're
from.
5) Send it to me at:
SuccessStories@doubleyourdating.com
(c) 2005-2007 David DeAngelo, All Rights Reserved. By
accepting and reading this article you agree that: You understand this to be an opinion and not professional
advice, it is only to be used for personal entertainment purposes, you are solely responsible for any use of the ideas, concepts, and content and will hold David DeAngelo harmless.
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