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A Matter of Height

Author: "Being a Man in a Woman's World"

"Here are ten things women look for in men. Height isn't at the top of the list and the other attributes will certainly wake you up to thinking beyond height."

Dear Dr. Neder,
I have dated girls anywhere from 5'1 to 5'5 inches tall and even had girls 5'6 or 5'8 be attracted to me.

The thing is though, I am 5'8 1/2, which isn’t really considered short, but is certainly not tall either. I have a solid, muscular build, am 190lbs, and I was just wondering if most women have a preference of the following:

1. Same height or taller?

2. Three inches taller than themselves

3. Five inches, or,

4. WAY taller.

Put simply, no girl has ever complained about my height and I have never been turned down because of it. However, I was just wondering. I have friends that are chicks who say they prefer men as tall as them or taller, just slightly taller, and only one who says she prefers guys that are 6 feet or taller!

I don’t know if you are a tall guy doc, but is what they say actually true? Personally, I think complaining about height is just making excuses. My buddy who is 5'6 gets more ass than my other one who is 6'2, and I find that confidence is almost everything.

What do you think?


You shouldn't be worried about your height. You're actually above average! The average height for men around the world is 5' 6".

Yes, some women like tall men just like some men like tall women. It's a personal taste thing and not generally something you can say "all" or "most" women want. In fact, here's what women around the world rate as the most important and attractive attributes in men (in order of importance):

1. Power

2. Confidence

3. Sense of humor

4. Genuineness

5. Masculinity/Real Man/Alpha Male

6. Conversation Skills

7. Stylish/Fashionable

8. Looks

9. Money

10. Muscles

Notice a few things: First of all, your looks (which includes your height) is down at #8 on the list! What a waste it would be if you were to focus on height and not realize what's really important, don't you agree?

Second, "power" ranks as #1. What is power? Answer: it depends on what woman you ask! Some women see big guys as "powerful". Others see men that are brave or outspoken as "powerful". Others see men that are emotionally stable as "powerful". So, even that is based on preferences.

When you talk to girls about how important height is, you bring it to the forefront. Yes, some women claim they like guys that are 6-feet or taller. Some claim its 5' 10" or 5' 5" or simply "taller than me" or whatever the personal preference. However, that's not the question to be asking! The question to ask is "What's MOST attractive to you in men?" That's when you come back to the list I've already given you.

My mother had a great saying (she was only 4' 10" tall by the way!) She used to say: "It's not your height, but your stature that's important." Trust me; even at 4' 10" tall you never questioned her "stature".

Best regards...
Dr. Dennis Neder

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Copyright (c) 2007-2009 Dr. Dennis W. Neder All rights reserved.
Dr. Dennis W. Neder
Author of: Being a Man in a Woman's World
Dedicated to advancing the arts and sciences of relationships.
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Got a love, relationship or man/woman question? I answer all letters. You can write to me at for answers. For more information about my book, "Being a Man in a Woman's World", visit: 

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