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Badly Written Personal Ad Or Boring Person?

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Question:
In my experience with online dating, I have found that if I’m not crazy about a woman’s profile, and her emails are boring, that I end up having a bad date with them.

I got an email from a woman who falls into the “not so excited about her” category. I’m sort of on the fence about her but she does seem to be a little boring. Could she just be a bad writer, but not necessarily boring to hang out with? Should I meet her?

Answer:
It sounds like you have had a lot of experience with online dating and have discovered what has worked for you in the past and what hasn't. I would guess that is probably true for you in your dating life outside of internet dating, too. Have you spoken to her on the phone yet? Rather than devoting the time to go out with her for an evening, you seem to be unsure and a phone call is a great way to see if she’s got personality when she speaks.

My experience is that you are absolutely right. I’m all about being open minded about certain things (what people do for a living, where they live, how they look, etc.), but boring is boring. If you feel that way from your first interaction, I say trust your gut and forget about her.

I think one reason that people do get frustrated with online dating is that they don’t trust their gut and go on dates with people they knew they really didn’t feel excited about meeting. A date shouldn’t feel like going to get a tooth pulled at the dentist. If you keep going on these dates just because online dating affords the opportunity to go out with many people and you want to be open-minded, then you are going to start resenting online dating.

I say move on to the next woman and applaud yourself for caring enough to ask the question.

Good luck.
Best wishes,
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