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Question:
In my experience with online dating, I have found that if I’m
not crazy about a woman’s profile, and her emails are boring,
that I end up having a bad date with them.
I
got an email from a woman who falls into the “not so excited
about her” category. I’m sort of on the fence about her but she
does seem to be a little boring. Could she just be a bad writer,
but not necessarily boring to hang out with? Should I meet her?
Answer:
It sounds like you have had a lot of experience with online
dating and have discovered what has worked for you in the past
and what hasn't. I would guess that is probably true for you in
your dating life outside of internet dating, too. Have you
spoken to her on the phone yet? Rather than devoting the time to
go out with her for an evening, you seem to be unsure and a
phone call is a great way to see if she’s got personality when
she speaks.
My experience is that you are absolutely right. I’m all about
being open minded about certain things (what people do for a
living, where they live, how they look, etc.), but boring is
boring. If you feel that way from your first interaction, I say
trust your gut and forget about her.
I think one reason that people do get frustrated with online
dating is that they don’t trust their gut and go on dates with
people they knew they really didn’t feel excited about meeting.
A date shouldn’t feel like going to get a tooth pulled at the
dentist. If you keep going on these dates just because online
dating affords the opportunity to go out with many people and
you want to be open-minded, then you are going to start
resenting online dating.
I say move on to the next woman and applaud yourself for caring
enough to ask the question.
Good luck.
Best wishes,
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