 By Nancy Fagan, Author of "The
Complete Idiot's Guide To Romance"
It’s easy to be fascinated
by other people’s love affairs and desire to have what they have,
especially if the relationship is intense, happy, and seemingly
problem-free. These great love stories epitomize an ideal that
everyone would love to attain.
However, keep in mind that you are seeing only the public image of the
relationship. You don’t see the work that goes on behind closed doors.
All relationships take effort to be successful, especially great love
stories.
Would you like to make your relationship the greatest love story ever?
Of course you would; everyone would. If you would, just keep reading
along and learn how to do it. Before you know it, you will be
transforming your good relationship into a great one. Learn from Happy
Couples
The best way to learn about how to have the greatest love story ever
is to listen to how other happy couples do it. All you have to do is
ask or read about happy couples, and you will learn the tricks. For
instance, in the book The 30 Secrets of Happily Married Couples,
author Paul Coleman tells how happy couples stay happy. His findings
are based on many research studies on marital happiness. Basically,
his 30 secrets can be summarized into three main goals that all
couples should have:
* Practice good communication. Communication skills include
considering the part you play in the problem, trying not to be
defensive, and seeing the issue from your partner’s perspective.
* Have realistic expectations for a long relationship. Realize that
change involves ups and downs and appreciate the effect that major
changes, such as having children, will have on your relationship.
* Make time for each other. Make regular dates, have fun together, and
take every opportunity to be affectionate.
These three goals sound like such a simple
recipe for living happily ever after, but they require something that
many people forget: daily commitment.
Daily Commitment Is a Privilege
How many times have you heard someone say any of the following:
“I have to remember to get her a card,” “I must buy him a present,”
“I should take her out for dinner,” or “I need to call him”? Couples
commonly say these phrases. Having the greatest love story ever is not
built on things you “have to do.” Rather, it’s based on feeling
privileged to be able to do them. This difference in perception is the
difference between a happy couple and a super-happy couple.
Building the greatest love story ever
is work that is never complete. Love is a living, breathing thing that
requires daily attention to keep it alive. Just remember, if you put
in the minimum work, it will be reflected in the degree of happiness
and satisfaction you feel in your relationship. If you put in 100
percent, you will have a relationship that gives you 100 percent
fulfillment.
This is the kind of relationship others
admire and strive for. Taking part in the greatest love story ever
requires a lifetime of privileged work—and what an honor that is to
take on!
© Copyright 2004 Nancy
Fagan - Published with permission
Nancy Murphy, M.S.
www.TheDivorceHelpClinic.com
11622 El Camino Real, Suite 100
San Diego, CA 92130 (in Carmel Valley)
nancymurphy1@mac.com
(858) 764-2545
Author Info:
Nancy Fagan, M.S., best-selling author of 'The Complete Idiot's Guide to
Romance' and 'Desirable Men: How to Find Them' has appeared on several
hundred radio and television shows including Ricki Lake, Men are from
Mars/Women are from Venus, ABC News, NBC News, CBS News, The Berman &
Berman Show, FOX News. She has been featured in most major newspaper in
the United States and worldwide as well as regularly mentioned in the
nation's top magazines such as Ladies' Home Journal ('Can this Marriage be
Saved?'), Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Men's Health, Bride's, Seventeen, Women's
Day, Family Circle,Women's Own, BBW, Complete Women and dozens of others.
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