Getting There:
A good rule of thumb for beginning your online dating experience is "Search
Local, Begin Global". What this means is that you should begin posting your
profile on the biggest online services
since they will most likely have the most matching profiles of people in
your area. But do not exclude smaller services that are directed towards
specific types of singles. Read about the features offered, do a search to
see if they have people from your area and don't worry too much about your
first impression of anyone based on their posted profile. Make contact and
see how the person responds before judging them.
Managing Replies:
Unless you have shown a lot of weirdness in your profile, you should be
getting some replies and requests for contact within a couple of days. You
should attempt to reply to all messages you receive within two or three
days, so the person doesn't lose interest in you. A fresh new reply to each
message you get is recommended, don't 'copy and paste' the same reply to
everyone. Be personal and friendly, but not too revealing about yourself.
Check out their profile and see if your interested. Remember, don't judge a
book by it's cover!
Initiating Contact:
Often you'll come across the profiles of members that have joined a while
ago and may not have logged in recently and you'll have to send the first
message to them. That's fine. Keep in mind that most services email a member
when they have a message waiting and you can use this feature to your
advantage. Include in your first message why you messaged them, what you
have in common (based on their completed profile) and a little about
yourself. Keep the tone of your message friendly. This is not the time to
express your undying love or sexual abilities. Unless you don't want a
reply.
Beyond The First Contact:
After you have traded messages and the replies have been friendly and
ongoing, the next step is chat contact or the phone. Private chats are a
great way to get 'alone time' with the person in a 'real-time' conversation.
If this is not possible because of the service features or missing computer
hardware (no webcam), then move on to the phone call. Use an online service
that acts as an intermediary phone service
(blocks phone numbers from being revealed) or be use your call block service
available from your phone company when calling the other person, just to be
safe.
Meeting Face To Face:
There will come a time to meet in person. When conditions are right, this is
a natural, and very big, step. Don't be afraid to suggest a short controlled
date to meet and keep the conversation topics light and friendly. A local
coffee shop or diner is a good place to arrange this. Have a friend nearby
or scheduled for a phone call at the end of this date. Again, keeping in
mind your safety. Your first date is discussed in more detail in
this article.
Summary:
Be prepared by knowing the type of person you'd like to meet and the
qualities that are really important to you.
Spend time completing your profile,
all of the questions you feel comfortable answering. Include your photo.
Reply to messages promptly and send
messages first to those members you find interesting.
Chat and voice phone calls are to be
used to increase your friendship with others.
Face to face meetings should be under
controlled circumstances
Links discussed in this article:
http://www.alovelinksplus.com/dating/biggest.htm
http://www.alovelinksplus.com/dating/phone.htm
http://www.alovelinksplus.com/advice/the_coffee_date.htm
Today's Question