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The Shocking Truth About Nice Guys And Attracting A Woman

Being worthy of your environment allows you to attract quality women!

Get A Great Girl by Michael Marks ** Continued from this page <<

Actually, more than hitting on me. whenever I walk by, or whenever I interact with her, she ALWAYS has to twist the topic into something that obviously states how bad she wants to have sex with me (eg."I want to have sex with you"). she laughs and jokes when she says it, but that's what the subject matter leads to all the time.

Now, in my humble opinion, this girl is OFF THE CHARTS HOT, with a caveat: married with two kids.

anyways, this flirting thing continued, and my last day at that site, she got my email in a very sneaky way (pretended that her hotmail was down, and while she got me to log onto mine to "see if it was just her hotmail or all of hotmail that was messed up", she snuck a peek at my email address and emailed me that night).

ok, now I was like... whoa. I literally thought I was just an outlet at work for some possible marital dissatisfaction, and I didn't think she'd take it to the next level. anyways, I still somehow gave her the benefit of the doubt that she didn't really mean business b/c I just couldn't believe people cheat this easily and that people were this weak (even though I was just as weak once but in another way).

I only responded to one out of every 3 or 4 of her emails... just for fun really... and I thought it was all benign until today... when in a brief email she just said it: "so, are you into booty calls?".

This is when a revelation happened. My immediate answer was "not with a married woman, thanks", but I wasn't mean about it and felt terribly sorry for her, so I padded her ego a bit.

don't get me wrong, "physiologically" I wanted to have so much physical with her that I couldn't walk for a while, but my standards and principles are getting clearer. this time, mind won over body. infidelity is something I just don't support at all.

anyways, realizing I had this clarity and the fact that the decision was so easy and that I could care less what anyone thought is the most empowering thing ever. really. when I was weaker in the past, even though I never believed in infidelity, I may have thought about doing it out of sheer weakness and lack of self value (that I better take what I can get), or "man, people would think I'm such a loser for passing this up".

Not anymore. me: 1; insecurity: 0

But then, I started talking to friends about it, cuz it kind of disturbed me. and maybe I really need a wake up call, but what some of them said shocked me. an acquaintance of mine told me, "man, what are you doing? that's the safest sex out there. married women are often the most discrete", and this same person said he regularly has booty call sex with married women, and even more routinely takes home girls in the bar who have boyfriends".

Although other people were not as extreme in their opinions regarding this, they told me... "geez, maybe I would have done it... and everybody seems to be doing that these days anyway".

Even one of my best friends (and honestly Michael, my best friends are people I am very proud of as they really are awesome guys) said that when he was younger he actually slept with a married woman (he does regret it though).

Now, I know this has no effect on my principles, and my principles stand, no matter what anyone says.... and I realize that those people who say "don't worry no one will find out" don't get the freakin point at all - it's not about getting away with it versus getting caught, it's about selling your soul or not. but all this new info about the world was truthfully DEPRESSING.

I thought, THIS IS THE F*****G WORLD WE LIVE IN????? The value of marriage, or even relationships, has plummetted this low???

Of course, not all men and women are like this, but it's the trend that I find exceedingly disturbing now that I'm truly awake to it. Most people get caught up in the "*** ** *** ***" mentality to women that you allude to (that show is a CLASSIC example of those moron "experts", don't even get me started as to how misleading I think that show is).

It's amazing that it's so easy to justify participation in infidelity these days as just another honest sleazy act by just saying to yourself "all's fair in love and war".

and I just can't see why so many people buy into it. Sleeping with a married chick (or a chick with a boyfriend) just isn't congruent with someone who perceives that he has true inner value. If you know you have value, the whole idea is absurd - analagous to eating off of someone else's plate when you're at a buffet (you KNOW you have unlimited food at the buffet, so why eat someone else's).

But more important than that. This little incident allowed me to reflect on the whole "how to get a great girl" theme of yours, and totally made things clear.

You attract what you are, so if you want to attract a scummy girl, do scummy things. If you don't want a cheating girl in your life, or even better, if you WANT a girl who vomits at the idea of cheating and has kick ass values, she will likely value a guy that has those values.

Plus, you become stronger yourself with every hard/monumental decision you make in life because each decision seems to add to the makeup of your "juice", as you say, in the middle of an orange. (that analogy where pressure on an orange will bring out whatever juice is inside the orange). that juice = the real YOU.

So the YOU that you are constructing with each decision you make (whether by direct effect or by the messages that the decision sends to your brain) will ultimately be brought out at some point because life's pressures always exist, and that great girl at some time I believe WILL see that real you and either love it or hate it. so better make a good you with good cumulative decisions.

As well, I'm realizing that I actually value relationships to a high degree. and I just realized that by making decisions such as partipating in cheating (whether you are the cheater or the one she is cheating with), you REDUCE how much you value relationships/marriage whether you are aware of it or not.

I learned this by the opposite effect, as after making my decision, I noticed how my value for relationships /marriage actually INCREASED. it just did.

I agree by leading in this way is a rare and special form of attraction to a special woman that she is likely not going to see much of in this ridiculous world. when one day you put a ring on the finger of that deserving woman, that ring means as much as the decisions you've made in this regard up until that day (ie, the promise of marriage has as much value as the amount that you value marriage).

you'll know it, and I think, at least subconsciously, so will she.

anyways, peace.

Robert T. Miami

>>>MY COMMENTS<<<

Awesome stuff. You illustrated so many points- the first one is that as you escalate in your own internal development, THAT is when you will find that those who are not like you will suddenly notice the change even more, and yet at the SAME time, the reality also is that as you become a MASTER, a woman like her will already SENSE that she is barking up the wrong tree and won't even TRY. Of course, the fact you didn't give in to external social/cultural pressure makes you that much CLOSER to that development.

Also, you have done something else very powerful The fact that you have PROVEN to yourself that you can stick to your values shows you that it IS possible, and that there are women out there just like you as well.

It's interesting how I noticed that all the people and pick up experts who tried to scare the hell out of everyone by saying that with their "skills" they could get any woman to cheat, well guess what? It was THESE GUYS THEMSELVES who were cheaters, and since they could not trust themselves, of course they could not trust women- so they go and label all women as cheaters.

There are cheaters and there are people who won't cheat for a billion dollars. When you are not naïve, when you are intelligent and you are a person of integrity, you are then able to also far easier detect OTHERS who have the SAME level of integrity and intelligence.

There actually ARE enough men and women with great integrity and character, but until you bring yourself up, you can't notice them, the same way that if you aren't conscious of say, a red Honda car, you won't notice them, and then when you are, you'll see lots of them.

Similarly, when you yourself have changed, as you are doing right now, you will start to notice them as well, because you will gravitate towards different people, who lead to others with similar values.

This is part of what Tony Robbins would call "sensory acuity" - your senses and your mind become super-attuned to where to get what you want, because you have BECOME the very same thing yourself. You have already started the process, as you have explained, you are experiencing internal changes already and have barely had the new book for a week...

And of course, when a person is a cheater who has no integrity, he will then hang out with similar types. Hence, the pick up artist crowd that hangs out at drunken clubs and parties till they are smashed and vomiting over toilets. That is, as Bill Cosby says, how some people "enjoy" their weekend because they feel they "deserve" to enjoy this type of "party".

The other thing of course is that a fantastic woman who has HER act together will expect that this test of character you went through should be super EASY for you in the future. Because she already has this stuff worked out in her mind and she's not going to invest her fantastic character and emotions in just any guy.

TRUST is key, and again, this is where the pick up artist and the typical "dating guru" culture really is not equipped to handle this level of trust. Their stuff is designed for parties, for emotionally low level interactions, it's not designed for the kind of interaction that can serve as a real foundation for the future.

So now that you have passed THIS level, you have now opened the doors to a far more ELITE level woman- not just any girl, but a GREAT girl.

You already could have had all the booty calls on earth, with women who are smoking hot, and all without DOING anything, no pick up artist games or gimmicks.

This is NOT a coincidence- it's a direct result of your skyrocketing internal development that you have applied from what you learned.

Way to go! And keep in touch as you continue to improve!

Cheers,
Michael

 

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This article © 2008 Cheerful Attitude Web Design Ltd. Michael Marks and "Get A Great Girl" and may not be reproduced without authors consent.