***How To Get A
Girlfriend***
Well, if you've been reading my newsletters for awhile, then I'll bet that
the title of this particular article got your attention...
I know, I know... I don't usually talk very much about "girlfriends" and
"relationships".
But today is SPECIAL.
It's special because I'm going to take an entire article to talk about the
subject.
Of course, I'm not going to talk about the "usual" stuff like how to buy a
woman flowers and how to apologize when you're late for dinner.
Nope.
I'm going to talk about something FAR more important. I'm going to talk
about how to GET a GREAT girlfriend...
and what to do once you've GOTTEN her so you don't screw it up and LOSE her.
As a quick side note, I really believe that most men ULTIMATELY want a GREAT
relationship with a beautiful, interesting, intelligent woman.
The REASON most guys learn to be more successful with women and dating is to
find a GREAT one... not just so they can date a million women. Sure, some
guys just want to date a lot of women, and aren't "relationship" material.
But I believe that probably 90%
of guys who study this area of life do so because they want to have OPTIONS
when it comes to women and dating... and they want to be able to meet and
date more intelligent, attractive, and interesting women... but ULTIMATELY I
think that most guys would like to meet a really nice, attractive woman to
share a great relationship with.
If you've read my eBook "Double Your Dating" and you've gotten my Advanced
Dating Techniques Program... and you've been reading and applying what
you're learning from these newsletters, then you're meeting more women.
And what happens when you learn how to meet women in any situation... and
you start dating more women?
Duh... your standards go UP.
Instead of just "settling" for any woman that will go out with you, you
start wanting THE BEST. This is only natural.
Here's where things get
interesting...
When a guy who hasn't been particularly good with women and dating gets his
first date with an UNUSUALLY wonderful woman, it will often shake him up...
and he'll "forget" everything he's learned... and start acting like his
former "Wuss Self".
When the stakes go up in life, we humans get nervous.
And this nervousness often hurts us by "blanking" our minds, and makes us
SCREW UP... instead of HELPING us by calming us and causing us to remember
what we SHOULD be doing.
Hey, I didn't design humans... I just work with what's already there. Don't
blame me. So how does this translate when it comes to guys dating unusually
attractive women for the first time? Well, after having this happen in my
own life many times, and getting emails from countless guys who have gone
through the same thing, I think the process goes a little something like
this:
1) Become frustrated because he's not having success with women and dating.
Decides to do something about it.
2) Starts learning techniques and ideas to improve success. Begins to
improve, and realizes that it IS possible to have more success with women.
Feels excited as results improve.
3) Wakes up one day and realizes that the types of women that were
previously "untouchable" are, in fact, within reach. Decides to do something
about it.
4) Gets a date with a woman that was previously "out of his league".
Instantly becomes aware that this is a VERY important situation. Becomes
nervous.
5) Goes out on the date, and acts like a Wuss Bag. Because he knows the
MAJOR mistakes to avoid, and the important things to do, still does "OK"...
to the point where the woman has a good time, enjoys herself, etc.
6) Goes home and says to self "Self, you'd better not screw this one up.
Call her and ask her out again. This girl is RELATIONSHIP MATERIAL. It's OK
to call her a lot and act like a Wuss, because she's different. I know that
David D. would He-Bitch-Man-Slap me for this, but if he knew how amazing
THIS PARTICULAR girl was, he would understand." Part of this step is
thinking about the girl all the time, and secretly wondering if she's OUT
WITH ANOTHER GUY.
7) Proceeds to call and get Date #2 (for the very next night, of course).
8) On Date #2 (or Date #3) says to the girl "You're special. I have FEELINGS
for you." (Or something equally emotional, needy, clingy, or Wuss-like.)
9) Calls the amazing girl every day... to the point where she stops
returning his calls and starts actively avoiding his calls. Girl finally
says something like "I think I need some time ALONE right now in life" or
"It's not YOU, it's ME" or "You're such a great guy, and I really like you a
lot... but I'm just not ready for a RELATIONSHIP right now", etc.
10) Writes in to David D. and says "HELP, you've got to help me out with
this one. Please please please. This girl is amazing and I want her to be my
girlfriend, but I acted like a Wuss, and now she only likes me as a friend.
What can I do to get her back?"
And if you've been tuned in to my newsletter for awhile, you know EXACTLY
what I'm talking about. Hell, if you've been tuned in long enough, YOU have
probably sent me an email like the one I just mentioned.
So there are two pieces to this puzzle:
1) How to get a girlfriend.
2) How to not screw it up when you get one.
HOW TO GET A GIRLFRIEND
Here are some ideas for how to GET a great girlfriend:
1) Realize that attractive, intelligent, amazing women are IN DEMAND. They
are RARE (I believe that a man who has his life together and understands
women and attraction is FAR RARER, but that's a different conversation).
2) Because these women are rare and in demand, they usually have a lot of
EXPERIENCE with men. And guess what? MEN ARE VERY PREDICTABLE. Men usually
ask women out in one of a few PREDICTABLE ways... and they usually act one
of a few PREDICTABLE ways on dates... and they usually respond in one of a
few PREDICTABLE ways after the date... etc.
3) When it comes to the unusually attractive, desirable women, they have
usually had a LOT of men who have "fallen" for them "too quickly". In other
words, when they meet a guy who falls for them quickly, they RECOGNIZE it
instantly, and RESPOND to it by RUNNING away.
4) If you want to get one of these desirable women to consider a
RELATIONSHIP with you, you need to NOT act like one of the other 100 boring
guys she's gone out with.
5) It is VITALLY important that you learn everything you can about women and
dating before you go looking for a long-term relationship with a fantastic
woman. Of course, I recommend my eBook and other advanced materials for
this. You won't find a better education anywhere on this topic, and what
you'll learn from me will definitely help you get your "game" together in
this area. If you can't afford to get my materials right now, just keep
reading these newsletters religiously. They're jam packed with great
information, and they'll help you tremendously. The point is that you have
to KEEP WORKING on it. Don't just learn a few things and think "OK, I've got
it".
6) You must give an unusually attractive woman SPACE. You can't call her
every day, tell her that you're in love with her two days after you've met
her, chase her around, always ask what she's doing, etc. You must give this
special woman THE GIFT OF MISSING YOU.
7) When you're in her presence, you must not treat her like you desperately
want and need her approval. There's a way to do ANYTHING and have it mean
ANYTHING. Whatever you do, don't try to "impress" her, act apologetic for
anything about yourself, or otherwise give away your personal POWER. EVER.
8) If you have a life, stay with it. If you don't have a life, get one.
Don't sit around wondering what she's doing, calling her, telling her how
you "feel", etc. If she wanted another "girlfriend", she'd get one. So don't
act like one. Desirable women want men who are INDEPENDENT, and who give
them SPACE. In fact, if anything, you need to give a woman like this TOO
MUCH space. You want HER to be the one who is calling YOU to figure out what
you're up to.
9) If you sense that this woman is "testing" you by being difficult, trying
to change plans with you on short notice all the time, etc. then RELAX. Lean
back. Never let her "get away" with anything just because she's beautiful,
or let her have any "special privileges" because you like her. NEVER.
10) If you want a long-term relationship, let it DEVELOP over time. I
personally don't think it's a good idea to even CONSIDER having a
relationship with a woman until you have known her for a MINIMUM of 90 days.
MINIMUM! If you take this mindset, it will FORCE you to chill out and let
things develop over time, instead of trying to "force" them. You'll be VERY
different from the other guys she's dated, and you'll find that SHE starts
letting the "I have special feelings for you" talk slip out.
I'm suggesting a way of thinking, behaving, and communicating that is VERY
different from the way most men think, behave, and communicate.
It is "counter intuitive"... it doesn't really seem to make sense at first.
And it is NOT what your FEELINGS will tell you to do if you're not
experienced with women.
But if you want to avoid being one of the guys who writes me a "David, you
have to help me please please please..." letter, then I recommend you
strongly consider this stuff... and use what you're learning from me.
HOW TO NOT SCREW IT UP WITH THE GIRL YOU HAVE
Now I'm REALLY getting into territory that I don't usually talk about, but
I'll take a few minutes and comment on a few things...
I personally think one of the biggest mistakes men make with women comes
down to GIVING AWAY PERSONAL POWER. This usually means acting apologetic,
allowing a woman to "get away" with things that subtly put her "in control"
of you, and behaving like a WUSSY.
Women don't feel that magical emotion called ATTRACTION for men who give
away their power. Women aren't attracted to WUSSIES.
And what do most men do once they get into a long-term relationship?
Of course...
They start acting like Wussies.
Go figure, huh?
And another of the biggest mistakes that men make with women is acting
BORING AND PREDICTABLE. These are two sides to the same coin. Most guys do
this right from the beginning, and kill any chances of having ANY kind of
success with a woman. But the REAL challenge comes when you get into a
longer relationship with a person... because they get a chance to LEARN what
to expect. In other words, it's harder to not act boring and predictable
with someone who has known you for a long time.
But you MUST do it if you want to keep the magic alive!
What I'm trying to say is that it's not enough to get a woman to say "Yes, I
want to be in a relationship with you" or "Yes, I want to marry you". You're
going to wake up in five years, and still have to MAKE your relationship
great. Just because it's great now doesn't mean that you can "let it slide".
I get a kick out of the emails I get from all the married guys out there who
are using these materials and techniques to put the spark back into their
marriages. Yes, even your wife who you've been married to for twenty years
still wants you to make her feel ATTRACTION for you.
I hope this article has made you think. And I hope it has made you realize
that there's a lot more to GETTING and KEEPING a really attractive, amazing
woman than a few tricks.
You have to do a lot of INNER work if you want to be the kind of guy who can
keep an amazing woman.
When I was on my own personal quest to learn how to attract women, I found
that most of the materials available only focused on the OUTER game. In
other words, they only talked about techniques. They said "Just go up to a
woman and say HI..." but they didn't talk about HOW to say the words, or how
to understand what the woman would be thinking when I did approach her... or
any of the million other "INNER GAME" issues around meeting women.
After spending a few years figuring this stuff out, I have realized that it
is VITAL that a guy get his Inner Game together FIRST. Once you understand
how and why women are attracted to certain types of men, and how the human
"mating dance" works, you will SEE things differently. You'll understand
things in a new way. It's like putting on a pair of 3-D glasses... and
seeing things in a totally new way.
Then, I think it's important to learn THE BEST "techniques" and actual
strategies for meeting women... from where to go, to what to say, to how to
take things to a "physical" level smoothly and without "rejection".
If you want to learn how to meet the kind of exceptional woman that is
"relationship material", and then KEEP her once you do find her, then this
program will be priceless to you.
You can download my eBook immediately here:
www.doubleyourdating.com
- just follow the 'ebook' link and download your copy.
...and read it, learn it, and use it.
Talk to you soon,
David D.
P.S. As you can probably imagine, I get a TON of email... So if you'd like
to send me a Success Story, Question, or Comment, follow these guidelines:
1) Keep it short and to the point. Two paragraphs max.
2) Tell me what's working for you before you ask your question. I appreciate
all of the "Your stuff is great" and "I don't need to tell you how well your
stuff works" comments, but the fact is that I DO need to hear all of the
specifics... because this helps other guys to see what's working in
different situations.
3) If you have a Success Story, write "Success Story" in the subject line of
the email. I read these first.
4) At the end of the email, give me your initials and tell me where you're
from.
5) Send it to me at:
SuccessStories@doubleyourdating.com
(c) 2003-2008 David DeAngelo, All Rights Reserved. By
accepting and reading this email you agree that: You understand this to be an opinion and not professional
advice, it is only to be used for personal entertainment purposes, you are solely responsible for any use of the ideas, concepts, and content and will hold David
DeAngelo harmless. http://www.doubleyourdating.com
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