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Advice Central Features
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aLoveLinksPlus Will Tell It To You Straight!
KNOW THE DIFFERENCES OF DATING AND MATCHMAKING
This is quoted from a conversation with Robert Bentsen, VP of Lisa Bentsen's Singles Search
"Most
of the stuff out on the web is what I call personals. That is, they
are databases where you can "go get" what you are looking
for. There is no screening and no cross-matching. Really, they
consume a lot of time and effort and produce little. Yet, they are
very popular because singles do not really know the differences.
Dating services do a little better in that if they are legitimate,
they attempt to match people up who at least have something in
common. True matchmaking services such as ours, actually match for
compatibility and then cross-match to ensure that both parties needs
are met and at a percent greater than 60. Many of the so called
dating and matchmaking services do not do that. There needs to be a
distinction made so that the single can truly choose what type of
service he wants. We try to educate our visitors (Dating or Mating
and Matchmaker for Me)."
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READ PLENTY
OF ADS BEFORE YOU WRITE YOUR OWN
It
is easy to see what works and what doesn't when you start reading
what is being written out there. Read the men's and women's ad's. Use
the things that attract you to a certain type of ad and adjust it for
yourself. Stay away from what seems horrible to you. The words you
use is the FIRST IMPRESSION that you'll make.
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TRY
BEFORE YOU BUY
Any
personals site worthwhile will be happy to prove it to you. Browse
the ads, place your own ad, search for the real type of person that
you want in your life. When you have found enough people that you are
interested in meeting, join the club. Don't limit yourself to one
club. You don't shop in only one store, don't limit your choices here
either. Know that eventually you'll have to pay for a singles
service, but don't base your choice on price alone, find a service
that has plenty of members that you'd like to trade messages with and
jump in!
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SIGN
UP USING AN E-MAIL ALIAS
Protect yourself, always! Starting
right from the beginning, you should sign-up for an e-mail alias, and
use it when you sign up for the singles service. Use it when you
start corresponding outside of the club with your potential date too.
Be sure to choose a sensible name, "wildgirl@dateme.com"
or "hornyguy@dateme.com" will only get you in trouble.
(Sign-up now, the form will pop up in a new window.)
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A
PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS
Use the words! Again we're
talking security here. A smiley face, a picture of your car or pet
will get noticed too. And your ad still gets "elevated
status" by having a picture with it (many people only browse ads
with pictures). When you get past the beginning e-mails with your new
friend, then is the time to trade pictures. But please be aware that
some sites frown on this, so check with the sites rules about
including an image other than your own.
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DO
NOT LIMIT YOURSELF BY LOCATION
We live in a portable world!
Destiny might just bring together the Pacific and the Atlantic oceans
for you. Do not deny yourself the opportunity of meeting the right
person just because they do not live within 100 miles of you.
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HONESTY
IS THE BEST POLICY
Your ad is getting lots of responses,
great! When it comes time to meet face to face, you don't want to be
apologizing or making excuses for the untruths that you told. Honesty
attracts honest people. Stick with your instincts too. If you feel
that who you are writing and chatting to isn't being truthful, bail
out while the waves are still small.
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KEEP
AN OPEN MIND
Meeting people always involves new experiences,
and this is just as true on-line. Download a contact program, such as
ICQ,
and stay in constant touch on-line. With a program like this, you
could both watch a classic movie at
www.NBCI.com,
and even talk all the way through it, just like kids!
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REPLY
TO MANY ADS
Your response to someone's ad or profile should be
well thought out and not pushy. And be one e-mail long, do NOT send
not several e-mails before you get a reply, it will make you seem
desperate and harassing. Wait for the person to answer you back, and
continue replying to other ads, do not send a second e-mail until you
receive a reply to the first. Many people do not delete their ads or
profiles once they no longer have a need to use the service, so you
may be talking to someone that isn't even there!
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DO
NOT GIVE UP
Getting responses from the right person can be
hard, don't give up. Reword your ad, try a new site, stay friendly.
If you set a time limit on yourself, your pessimism will show
through. Don't rush into anything!
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