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On Line eDating Advice

Knowing how love happens online is the first step

If you're using online dating services, even social networking sites, you need to know how to keep yourself safe when you plan your first face-to-face meeting with someone you met online.


The First Step

You've exchanged a few emails, maybe gotten hot and heavy through email. But there comes a time when you need more immediate connection with the person you've met online.

That's where Instant Messenger chat comes into play. You need to chat. Instantly. If you have an Instant Messenger program, or better yet, if the online dating service you're using has an IM feature, use it. Be sure to ask the IMPORTANT questions.

The Second Step

You have to move onto real voice communication that takes place outside of the dating service you're using. That's right, it's time for the PHONE CALL.

The reason for this is to be (almost) certain that the person  you think you're chatting with online is the same person that answers the phone when you call.

And, you can tell a lot more about a person when you hear their voice, the inflections and emphasis of their speaking. This might just be as close as you get.... because if your gut says something is wrong at this second step you should NOT continue talking wit them or planning a meeting with the person.

The Third Step

This is the deal-maker or deal-breaker.

You've shared a lot through emails and instant messaging. You've had a few great hours-long phone calls. But there comes a time when the face-to-face meeting has to happen. And, if you sense that there might be some magic in this budding relationship, you've got to plan this meeting quickly, and with a great deal of care.

This should be a public meeting, in a place you are familiar with. You should set this meeting up for mid-day, maybe between 1:00pm and 5:00PM.

If you don't drive make sure you have a ride to and from the agreed to meeting place.

 You should have a cell-phone with you, and a friend placed in the background, at a different table, somewhere within the meeting place. A phone call should be set up so you can make a quick exit if you start feeling uncomfortable. Remember, you really don't know anyone until you can "smell them" so don't feel bad if everything was going great right up until the face-to-face meeting. These things happen, be happy you learned all this early enough to move on from the now not-happening relationship.

The Final Step

The relationship has either started or ended... all the next moves are yours!


Additional Things You Should Know

Use instant messenger programs with your personal safety in mind. Just as you shouldn't use your real name in your email address, don't use any identifiable information in your instant messenger program and this includes contact that may lead to you, pictures and other information that you use in the setup of the program that may unintentionally supply too much personal information about yourself.

When using the phone to call someone, don't use your own personal phone or your work/business phone. Putting safety first use or the call-a-phone feature in your IM program.

When meeting face-to-face never lave your drink or food unattended. Go to the bathroom after you've eaten and drank and only drink the drinks that you have been served fresh, do not drink or eat anything the other person may have had contact with before you receive it.

When possible, have a friend waiting for you at a pre-agreed on time after your face-to-face meeting. Do not go anywhere with the person you've met without letting a family member or close friend know about the change in your plans.

if you ever, at any time feel uncomfortable, leave. Go with your gut instinct and don't wait to be pushed into anything you do not want to do.

Make sure you have cash for a cab ride home, even if you drove to the meeting place.

Keep yourself safe but still try to have fun... everything you do now will be the future you will have tomorrow.



Article copyright Robert Lee and Cheerful Attitude Web Design Ltd. You may republish this article as long as this copyright notice remains intact and the link to is active.




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