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Revenge When My Roommate Is A Bitch
Dear RG,
I have a really irritating roommate. There are four of us in our house, and she thinks that she owns the place. She doesn't clean her dishes, instead she fills the sink with water, puts them in and assumes somebody else will do them for her. She doesn't have a job, so instead of getting one, she 'borrows' food from the rest of us. She has gotten a dog, which is strictly in violation of our lease.
She repeatedly had mid-week parties that last until four am. This is a big problem for me, because I start work at 5 am. I have tried being really loud in the morning, but she seems to sleep right through it. I also don't think that it is fair to wake my other roommates up early just because she is inconsiderate. I am going to tell the landlord about the dog, but would like to do something that would make up for all the sleep I have lost due to her selfishness.
Thanks,
Helen
Hi Helen,
I'd wait until the last few days of your roommate living there. Then I'd start adding things to the food you leave around that she eats.
Toothpaste inside Oreo cookies, extra salt mixed into the butter or margarine, orange juice made with salt, Any type of food, you can booby-trap. Since she's not really supposed to be eating it, the blame is simply hers, right?
And she's not being fair having people over to party when others need to work. I bet this is her first place and first taste of freedom. She's too stupid to realize that even freedom has rules.
So I'd get your roommates together and write down everything she's done since she lived with you:
Stealing food;
Parties;
Whatever.
And I'd send that to her next landlord, the day after she moves in.
If you want to keep roommates tame, you have to have them sign a behavior contract before they move in. This way they know what is allowed and what isn't. If you don't then whatever they do is on you.
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