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Long Distance Relationships In The Military

Stephen Blake, Author "Loving Your Long Distance Relationship". Find out more about the "Loving Your Long Distance Relationship" Series of books, or to order your own copy visit Stephen Blake's website.Learn how to handle and maintain a long distance relationship.

Stephen Blake, Author "Loving Your Long Distance Relationship". Find out more about the "Loving Your Long Distance Relationship" Series of books, or to order your own copy visit Stephen Blake's website. Read how others have survived the 'long distance' in their relationships. You're not alone!

Article from the Loving Your Long Distance Relationship archive

Well my story is this,

I was home on leave from just finishing up at the fire academy in Texas which completed my Air Force Fire Fighting technical training. It was pretty long and hard but I did it, oh yeah I was 1 of only 3 females in about 700 males at the school. I am now in England as a fire fighter but am the only female here, so my life is challenged enough as it is...anyways I met this guy when I was home that was a friend of my best friend, he was in the Marines and recently got out.

When we met we both clicked, but I kept my distance and didn't let him know how I felt cause I knew I only had a few more weeks at home in California then I would have to report to my duty station in England. It was hard enough leaving my friends behind and I had just gotten over a long 2 and a half year relationship. Anyways the guy and I hung out the whole time I was home and when I left he stayed in contact with me and we talked now and again...the months went by and his devotion to me was so heart warming, I could tell how much he cared, and it didn't seem to matter to him I was far away and couldn't be around him.

One day in the mail I received his dog tags! I was so happy I put them on and have not taken them off since. So I sent him mine too...he now wears them and hasn't taken them off. We finally both started talking often and I gave in when he bashfully asked me to be his over the phone. We have known each other since 24 Nov 02 and have been talking since, we started dating long distance over the phone 03 Apr 03 and I got to go home in May for 3 weeks on leave to see him. It was the best time ever, we truly click in a way that I know he is the one I have been looking for to travel down this path called life.

We are so devoted to each other and respectful it's nuts! I know have been back home for a full month since I last saw him and it's sooo hard, we love each other sooo much, but I have to do my job to secure my future and it's sorta funny cause I am the female in the relationship yet I am the one in the military (now cause he was a marine, which helps him understand what I am going through) and I am a fire fighter which is normally a male job.

I am the one that had to leave him behind and he always jokes how he feels like the chick in the relationship, anyways we both have been looking for each other for so long and now that we found each other the timing really sux cause it's so hard to be apart. I call him ever other day cause as a fire fighter I work 24 hour shifts, and there is a time difference so I go to bed early so I can wake up around 1 in the morning my time and usually spend 4 hours on the phone.

I hate being apart and he hates it to, but I don't know what else to do so that is how I found this site, seeking long distance relationship advice to help us through. Plus I will be going to Iraq soon and I know that is going to be a really hard time for us, especially since I will be one of the few females there, I know he will be worried, so I want to help make us as strong as I can before I go.

Saundia and Harley for life! = )

Saundia, England


Reviews of Online Dating Services For Military People

Prior to becoming an item I'd invited him round to my house for dinner and during dessert and a chat with my mother we discovered that one of his best friends (in Holland) is the son of an old friend who my mother once worked with many moons ago (what a small world!). So that certainly broke the ice and almost suggested that there was something quite special between us.

So since then we are still living apart. Let me explain. Just before we met, Doron had enrolled on a 4-year hotel and management course in one of the top hotel schools in Europe. So, what with our many backward and forward visits I decided to leave my last job January 2003 and find a job in Amsterdam. My hunt was unsuccessful and me not working and being without friends did put an unwanted strain on our relationship. So after 2 months (financially I couldn't stay longer and pay rent there) I decided to come back to London in March 2003. I have now found myself a great job with prospects in London and have no intentions to leave for along time. So it has been a difficult time. Fortunately Doron is coming to London in 3 weeks to do 6 months work experience here, which I am so looking forward to but after that things are unclear. We got engaged last August but both know that it will be a while before we can settle down. He'll have another 2 and half years left of his course when he goes back to Holland next Jan so there's still a tough time ahead.

I think the hardest thing has been that I've seen many of my friends settle down in comfy relationships and move out of their parental home and I can't do all of that yet. There are so many things to consider. Essentially I still feel single, my single mates consider me as one of them and often want me to go clubbing but I only really see that as a place to meet a partner or go occasionally for someone's birthday. As an engaged couple we haven't shared everyday experiences like other couples do. Yes we've argued and gone through periods of uncertainty about our future but we haven't paid bills or had late nights and early mornings for work together yet. There are times when I may have had a crappy day at work or felt down about something and obviously with a long distance relationship there isn't the spontaneity of sharing it with your partner, these are all things we have discussed.

Some might wonder why we got engaged and how do I know I want to spend the rest of my life with this guy and vice versa. It's something we've talked about a lot and also given one another the option to back out of but it all comes down to a few simple things. We're soul mates there's an unspoken feeling between us that says that there is no one else. We both couldn't imagine sharing our lives with anyone else but each other. We are often frustrated at the distance but equally excited about our future together as man and wife and all the things that come along with that.

There was time in the beginning when I'd be out with friends and spot a handsome guy in a bar or restaurant and think mmm ... nice, now I think nice looking but I'll stick with the most amazing guy! (Well almost amazing!)

Michelle, United Kingdom

Learn how to handle and maintain a long distance relationship.If you have a Long Distance Relationship Love Story, publish it today by clicking here. Find out about the "Loving Your Long Distance Relationship" Series of books from Stephen Blake's website.

Copyright (c) 2003, 2004 Stephen Blake. All rights reserved.


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