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Michael W - The Dating
Wizard: The Spell To Dating Success
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Hey Michael,
I’ve been reading your articles and finding that I can get a girl’s number or
email after chatting a bit with her and using some humor, but I notice that
things fizzle out after a date or two.
Suddenly, they have other plans, or they tell me they met someone, etc. I get
the feeling that I must be something wrong from the time of getting a girl’s
number to the actual dates, because this keeps happening to me over and over
again. I try to keep things going smoothly on the dates, I try to keep the
conversation going, etc. I really don’t give the women any reason to not want
to go out with me again. Any ideas to help me out?
Terence,
Vancouver
MY FEEDBACK:
I’m glad that you’re putting the advice into action, but there is something
very, very important that you are missing here: You mention how you “try to
keep things going smoothly”, trying to “keep the conversation going” and how
“you don’t give the women any reason” to not want to go out with you again.
Ironically, you have already actually HIT THE NAIL ON THE PROVERBIAL HEAD. You
have just stated what you are doing WRONG. What is this thing that you are
doing to SABOTAGE (albeit unknowingly) your success?
I’ll tell you: You are trying to “FIT IN” with HER. In other words, she gets
the feeling SHE is leading the show here. She feels SHE is dominant.
Get ready for this: If there is one thing that turns women OFF more than
anything else, it's a man with a lack of DOMINANCE. And an attractive woman
can smell a lack of dominance like a shark smells blood.
This is one of those unspoken truths that should be explained to all males on
the planet earth as part of their formal education.
Now, most guys totally misunderstand what dominance really is. It's not about
being a tight-ass or an insecure control freak who yells and screams and
dictates to a woman everything that she should do. It's not about being
domineering. No, that's just insecurity.
Dominance is about CALMLY taking control as
if it NATURALLY belongs to you. And it's about CONVEYING that you are
this type of person, through SUBTLETIES in your gestures, movements,
voice tone, language, and facial expressions. I state “subtleties”
because it’s all in the DETAILS….
It's an ATTITUDE.
Being dominant with women isn't easy when you grow up being told for
most of your life that women want a man who is sensitive, who is
considerate of her wants and desires. It ain't easy when you grow up
being told that women want equality, and that only jerks disregard their
desire for total equality.
This is a huge topic, but let me give you
some examples of things you might see in a dominant man: Men who are
dominant tend to smile at a woman at very DIFFERENT times and for very
DIFFERENT reasons than men who aren't dominant. Men who are NOT dominant
will smile in a way that shows they are "trying to fit in" with a woman.
In other words, agreeing to everything she is saying, and WITH A SMILE,
no less. Or nodding a lot, WITH A SMILE. And laughing at all her jokes,
even if they're not funny. And just smiling sometimes for NO REASON,
other than the fact the guy is SO HAPPY to be with this beautiful woman
in front of him. I'm NOT saying that you shouldn't smile or laugh with a
woman, but only do it if you would smile and laugh at the same things
she is doing even if she was also 300 POUNDS.
Because otherwise, you are really just kissing her ass. A guy who is
dominant might smile at a woman in a SLY WAY if he just busted on her
big time. And even then, he might not. Because for him, he is so USED TO
BEING IN CONTROL, of getting the responses he wants, that it takes a
little more to impress him. It's more like "Of course she is enjoying
being with me- what's the big deal." A guy who is dominant makes
decisions with women. He does NOT say "Honey, where would you like to go
tonight?" or "It doesn't matter to me, where would YOU like to go?"
He does not get steered off course when women test him on his commitment
to those decisions. I know many women who have confidentially told me
that when a guy asks for their number, they will purposely say they
don't give out their number, JUST TO SEE IF HE IS DOMINANT ENOUGH TO NOT
TAKE ONE "NO" for an answer.
In other words, they want to see, "Is this the kind of guy who means
BUSINESS, or is he wishy washy?" Women don't mind giving out their
numbers, emails, etc, but they want a man WHO ISN'T A PUSHOVER.
Now, I think that some guys may have a bit of a dilemma: They really are
just happy-go-lucky guys who smile a lot. My advice for them is to hold
back a bit when they first meet a new woman or the smiling behavior will
be misinterpreted as weakness. Dominance also means NOT LISTENING to
every complaint that women give you, since half the time, women are
complaining only to see if you will kiss their ass! If you ever sense
that a woman's complaint is sounding like an attempt for control, you
better make sure to stick to your guns (unless she points out a valid
criticism, etc) or you will find that she will start to nag you even
MORE....all to see if you are losing your touch as THE MAN.
Your BODY LANGUAGE also conveys your dominance or lack of it. If you
tell a woman "I will not accept x behavior", but you are at the same
time looking down at the floor, or are fidgeting your hands it's like
you've destroyed any impact your words could have had. If you are
speaking with a woman, if you are nervous, your facial muscles will
often clench, your forehead will wrinkle, your eyebrows will be raised
in alarm, etc. Now, by consciously CHANGING your PHYSIOLOGY, and by
RELAXING those facial muscles, you will ACTUALLY CHANGE YOUR PSYCHOLOGY
as well, and truly start to feel more relaxed. So watch your facial
expressions and consciously relax them, and soon you will actually feel
more calm and confident in front of her.
Listen, if you think I am exaggerating, think about this: The CIA has
special agents trained in lie detection. They don’t look only at a
person’s WORDS to tell if he is lying. The behaviors that give away
someone as a liar may be as simple as a person tapping his foot against
the floor. Such “evidence” is known as a LEAK, since the truth is
LEAKING… These experts look at everything from body language to body
temperature to heart rate.
Now, attractive women are SO EXPERIENCED WITH DATING, and have gone out
with SO MANY MEN, that these women have “seen it all” and are pretty
darn good at telling which men are full of it and which men are the real
deal. These women can see the “leaks”. They KNOW when a man is confident
and when he is just acting, because they have seen the “signs” a million
times. These women look at your body language, your facial expressions,
your nose and forehead as they wrinkle in tension. So pay very, very
careful attention to being TOTALLY CONGRUENT in your facial expressions
and body language.
Being dominant also means not willing to compromise on your principles.
One thing I notice: The more compromises you make regarding your own
values in order to "keep a woman happy", the GREATER are the chances she
will grow MORE irritated and bored and not sexually interested.
On the other hand, the greater your standards, the less you compromise,
the more control you take, the BETTER a woman will treat you, appreciate
you, and feel sexual desire for you. Here's another thing about men who
are dominant: They don't feel the need to talk too much, they don't need
to become chatterboxes to “sell" themselves. They don't need to qualify
themselves to a woman, these men behave as if it's the woman who must
qualify herself.
And lastly, dominance is not only about having control in the
relationship, it's also about being the type of man who is in control of
his own emotions and his own life.
He who conquers his own heart, who is in control of his own emotions, is
the real victor in life. Women can't stand a man who is always
complaining and whining about his problems. Not only is it a bore, but
it's a sign of him being UNABLE TO COPE, and the most important sexual
criteria for a man has been his ability to survive and pass that ability
on to his children.
I know a lot of guys who feel that part of being with a woman is to be
able to share your sorrows and your triumphs with her- well, save the
sorrows till after you have already celebrated your 1 year anniversary,
because otherwise you'll never get to that point. (and even then, keep
the whining to a bare minimum). This goes back to forces beyond our
conscious control. It stems from what was from an evolutionary point of
view, the mark of a man who could SURVIVE and provide SURVIVAL for his
family.
DOMINANCE was part of that sign of such a man, and for a man, was far
more sexy (read: useful for survival and hence an element of adaptation)
than the notion of "being considerate" or "sensitive". And if you want
to know more about this and how ELSE to be TOTALLY successful with
women, I suggest you download and read my eBook, The Dating Wizard:
Secrets to Success with Women.
I spent years observing and researching what works for real men in the
real world. It was a process that required me to actually experiment
with the ideas myself to know if they worked or not. If an idea or
concept did not work consistently, it did not make it into the book. The
result is a work that I honestly feel is the most solid, all-in-one
eBook. There's no hypnosis involved, no tricks, just solid material that
works. You don’t have to be a comedian to make it work, either.
Everything you need to know is clearly explained inside. I give you
step-by-step details on how to approach women and get their numbers and
emails, how to get physical, and how to get her to want to see you again
and again. I've explained everything in a way that is thorough, yet NOT
COMPLICATED to understand.
This is the book for guys who are sick and tired of being the good guy
who gets left out. And, if you ever have ANY questions at all about
something in the book that you read, just email me and I will answer you
the same day. How's that for service?
 And on top of THAT, if you feel that the ideas and principles in my book
aren't useful for you, just email me and I'll refund your money.
You can begin reading this important
information within MINUTES of now.
To download the eBook, just go to:
The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women book page
And if you would like a personal one-on-one telephone or email
consultation with myself, you can now arrange that by calling 416 630
9966 or emailing me at Michael@TheDatingWizard.com
Over the course of one million years, man has adapted and evolved
powerful strategies for attracting women.
Now, you can learn them all in just a few hours of reading and practice.
Make the decision to become more successful with women NOW. You really
can have success with women- the choice is now in your hands.
Till next time...
From someone who's been there,
Michael W
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