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Nice Is Not What You Think It Is

Michael W. - The Dating Wizard - The Spell to Dating Success

Michael W - The Dating Wizard: The Spell To Dating Success
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You Can Learn the Most Powerful, Closely Guarded Secrets For Attracting Women Anywhere, Anytime, No Matter How Beautiful! This article is a small part of the information contained in the ebook "The Dating Wizard: Secrets To Success With Women". You will learn how to reclaim your masculinity and show the confidence that you've seen in guys that are popular, and successful, with women. For samples and more information visit The Dating Wizard Website

**Success Story From A Reader Of The Spell To Dating Success ebook**

Michael,
I can't believe I have been a fool for so long!!!!!
I have been using your techniques over the weekend and it is working a treat.

Instead of being a suck ass I have been cool, calm and distant and in response had drinks, lunch and even fuel put in my car by 4 different women without asking. They pretty much begged to do so.

I have been drained emotionally and physically for the last 6 months by a very hot girl, with no sex at all. The nicer I was the more she mistreated me - I told her I loved her at least 15 times! Now I am ignoring her, she is going berserk smsing and calling me!!! It may be too late for this one, but at least I am in control of my life once more!!

I have got my balls back at last!!!!!!!!!
Thank you Very Much, you are a saint!
Regards,
Rob, Australia

**My Comments**

Congratulations on the change in your life and your success. And thanks for your letter and the kind words. True stories such as yours are important for guys to hear, and though it might seem hard for some to believe, the truth is that results like this are actually NOT unusual when you have the skills. Sometimes guys get tunnel vision just because a woman is "hot". In fact, a guy will often fall into the trap of actually thinking that a woman is hotter than she really is simply because she is making herself so impossible to get.

The other thing I want to comment on is that what a guy THINKS is "nice" often is NOT. For example, a woman that is FED UP with guys who call her ten times a day and act all needy around her will NOT find it NICE when they meet a new guy and he starts getting all needy around her, and often within just a day or two of meeting her!!!!

But when you give women the GIFT of being an ATTRACTIVE guy by displaying all the right behaviours, they will GLADLY do things like get you drinks, lunch and even put fuel put in your car at today's crazy fuel prices lol! Not that THAT is the goal here of course, rather it's an INDICATOR of their attraction to you. All because you're giving them the gift of ATTRACTION and so they love you for it. You see, you CAN be "giving" to women, you just have to KNOW that the greatest gift you can GIVE a woman is displaying the behaviour of a MAN.

Keep it up, dude.

**Letter From A Reader**

Dear Michael,
Well, I am glad a Dating Wizard is an email away. All of us guys in today's world need a little help occasionally, especially with the confused and mixed messages we are constantly getting from our social environments concerning the sexes.

I met a woman who I called up and ask out. She anxiously agreed to go out with me.. We went to a dance and after a short while she said she wanted to go outside to smoke a cigarette. I ask her if I could join her, she said if I wanted, so I did. After I smoked a cigarette, she lit up another cigarette and told me I could go back in if I wanted. So I said ok. I didn't want her to feel like I was possessing her. I went back in waiting on her return. She didn't come back in for what I thought was a considerably long time. So I decided to go to the hallway where I could see outside.

She was there talking to another guy. I went down the hallway for awhile and went outside to the other side of the building. Soon to return back to the dance. She was standing in the dance waiting on me and ask me why I went down the hall. I told her I was just spying on her to make sure she was ok. Then I told her it made me nervous that she was talking to the other man. Also, since it was our first date and I didn't know her very well. She promised me that it was nothing and I shouldn't worry if she talked to other men. That she was with me.

We danced some more and after we sat down, she just stared and smiled at me for the longest time not saying a word, We soon left and chatted on the way home but she was constantly apologizing for making me nervous for leaving me alone and talking to the other guy. Then showed me a fast way to her house from where I lived. Well to make a long story short, she gave me an extremely passionate kiss with tongue and all, as our good night kiss and said she would go out with me again.

Now the next day she was off work but I had to go to Atlanta, and told her I would call her from Atlanta, and she said that was ok. NOW, here is what I am not sure about? I did call her Saturday evening from Atlanta from my Cell phone, which she also has my cell phone number. Her voice mail picked up and I left her a message, I left her a message saying I was just hoping she was having a good day. She never returned the call. She was previously married to a red neck, who even screwed around in front of her all the time, therefore, the goodnite kiss and smiling at me may have been because she appreciated a guy that was giving her some control and respect instead of demanding it for himself.

My question is, how long should I wait to call her again and what if I get her voice mail again? I have been out of the dating scene for quite sometime. Am I a little paranoid? Probably am. How long should I wait to call her and if I get the voice mail again, should I leave a message and if so, what should I say. This may be a stupid question but it's bothering me. Probably because I haven't dated in a while and I am fond of this woman.

Yours truly,
dangerously paranoid
Phil S.

**My Response**

In order to answer your questions, I have to FIRST explain the even bigger issues here, that way you can prevent problems in the first place. So let me take a play-by-play analysis of what happened here. I do this not to hurt your self- esteem, but to help you in the future.

The first place you went off course was when you asked her out to a dance. You might MEET a woman at a dance, but don't make your FIRST outing/date/meetup a dance. Can an expert break this rule? Of course, but then when you're an expert you know not to make life tougher on yourself unless you're looking for a challenge or you and your date just love dancing. You want to take your date somewhere fun, but not somewhere where you can't even talk because of the noise.

And also, dances are kind of like "pick up centres" so why would you want to bring a woman who you don't even know there???? It's a little different if you are already in a relationship and you both like dancing, etc. You have a certain amount of mutual understandings and trust and mutual investment in each other going on. So don't feed the sharks by bringing the woman you met to the shark pond.

Then, you took a major hit when you ASKED HER I you could join her for the cigarette. Now, I'm not sure how the interaction was going at that point, because you didn't elaborate, but it seems to me that had she really been majorly into you, she would have come back faster or dragged you with her out to smoke. Don't ask for permission for things like this, it makes you seem like an underling, and that spells doom for attraction. Be THE MAN, and LEAD the show, always. (and see if you can kick the smokin' habit, man) It's not "nice" to a woman to be asking her for permission to make your own decisions, it's actually revolting to them. It makes her feel BAD, honestly!!!!!

Now, when she said, after lighting up another cigarette, that you could go back in if you wanted, somehow that just seems to me as if she KNEW she had the CONTROL here, she knew YOU were into her, and she was thus feeling NO CHALLENGE, and also feeling like you weren't being THE MAN. And it's like she here was giving you PERMISSION to go back in, like you were a child, and she was the parent. Ugh. Not being THE MAN here, at all.

Even if she was saying this really nicely, the fact she was saying it at all means that she was taking you for a guy who needs permission from the woman he is dating to do anything.

And that is an ATTRACTION DESTROYER.

So basically, her saying this was a sign that she was not feeling that much attraction, in my opinion. The thing to do is tease her on this in a way that helps you reclaim some power, i.e. something like "yah, you know there were some hotties in there I better check out!" as you head back to the dance.

Now, when you said "ok" because you didn't want her to feel like you were possessing her, while it's important to NOT be controlling or domineering, and to show you are not afraid of her being independent and that you like her being independent because you have confidence she will want you anyway, etc, the problem is that this "ok" that you said in that specific context, actually came across as "Ok, I'll go now, Ms. Superior to me, thanks for the permission".

The next major disaster occurred when you went back in and she didn't come back in for a long time, by that point you should have been PICKING UP DOZENS OF WOMEN, or at least the most awesome one in the joint, know what I mean?????? You have to be THE MAN, you NEVER accept this kind of behavior.

You NEVER wait around for a woman who is not treating you well!

And you know what? I BET she KNEW you would be waiting for her on hands and knees. And the reason you made this mistake is NOT because you are somehow inferior, it's just because you have been TAUGHT ALL THE WRONG THINGS either consciously or subconsciously.

The next blow came when you saw her chatting to some dude. When you saw him chatting to her, the thing to do is roll right in there and tease her in totally confident yet fun relaxed way by telling the guy what a headache she is and demonstrate other awesome things about you indirectly, such as total confidence that you don't need her and that you aren't upset in the slightest, yet that you are having fun still. Of course, this is a HUGE topic, and I SERIOUSLY recommend you get my eBook IMMEDIATELY to get started on a MASSIVE change in your life and then take me up on a consultation or a bootcamp.

Then, when she asked you why you went down the hall, you made it seem like you are garbage and as if she is THE HOLY SUPERIOR WOMAN when you said that you were making sure she was ok. It's all a little TOO TYPICAL and expected and makes her feel like SHE is the one with all the value between the two of you. Also, she KNEW that you were not checking to see if she was ok, she knew you were getting insecure, I'm willing to bet ANY MONEY on this, and so all you accomplished was confirming this belief she probably had.

And then came the NEXT DESTROYER: You told her it made you nervous that she was talking to the other dude!!!!!!

NO! Now she thinks she's THE HOLY MS. SUPERIOR! And that she can throw dirt on you whenever she feels. Because, after all, what you are REALLY saying underneath it all is that you fear she might LIKE the other guy compared to you, that somehow maybe YOU don't have what it takes. And if YOU don't think you have it, of course she won't be any more generous about you worth.

So of course she tells you not to worry, because TALK IS CHEAP and it works to keep you QUIET as she DOES what she WANTS.

And then came the kissing stuff, but I believe you are on the money when you mentioned that she was with an abusive guy before and that THAT was the reason you got the smile for the longest time and the passionate kiss.

Often, women who go out with ABUSIVE guys, they end up going with those types AGAIN AND AGAIN. The reason is that for all kinds of screwed up reasons, usually due to low self esteem, they are ATTRACTED to them. And there are plenty of low self esteem women around, trust me, probably way more than there are low self esteem men.

For a brief while, these low self esteem women may appreciate the really nice guy, or even a NORMAL guy, like right after breaking up with a total abuser, but it's just not something that they can be attracted to because they believe they DESERVE abuse. So when you find out a woman was attracted to an abusive guy, you basically know the formula for attracting her again, irony of ironies. Because most people, men or women, never learn their lessons. At the same time, I STRONGLY SCREAM OUT TO YOU to AVOID these kind of women no matter what.

Now, sometimes low self esteem guys are attracted to low self esteem women, because at first, these women are really, really kind. Then you slowly find out the reason they are kind is because they think no one will love them, and so at first they are so appreciative. But slowly, they start to then wonder why YOU are with them, and they figure there must be something wrong with you if you love them, and so they lose respect for you, just as they have lost respect for themselves and anything associated with themselves.

Much better to find a HIGH self esteem woman who STILL knows how to appreciate you.

Onward:

THE FINAL ATTRACTION DESTROYER came when you TOLD her apparently right after the date or even the very next day after the date that you would call her from the city you were going to. This just makes her feel like you are making her MASSIVELY IMPORTANT to you before she has really earned it. And then, you called her that day, which makes you totally predictable, easy to take for granted, and which robs her of the fun of having to anticipate when you might call, and makes you come across as needy, insecure, and having low value.

And it all probably made her feel a certain amount of PRESSURE.

Also, it sounds like you left a typical boring message, "just hoping she was having a good day", when in fact you need to be focusing on conveying in a playful way that there is still a challenge here, and that she is kind of on trial with you, and this in itself would convey that you are a man in demand who has other choices as well.

The truth is I'm surprised you got this far with her. I don't want to be mean, but I'm wondering if it finally sunk into her that you were not being The Man.

So you see, if you just DO THE RIGHT THINGS IN THE FIRST PLACE, you don't have to worry so much about when to call, because she will WANT you to call, and she will probably be calling you as well.

You need to seriously get on the right track again and forget this woman and IMMEDIATELY download my eBook. With this woman, I would not even worry about her, DO NOT GET CAUGHT UP ON THIS ONE WOMAN OR YOU WILL LOSE PERSPECTIVE. This is a huge topic I go into detail with in my book as well. Just focus on improving with other women and doing things right. If you really want to call her again, give it a break for a few weeks, and call her again, but do things RIGHT.

Then you'll do the right thing whether it's her or her machine, because you will be TRIGGERING HER EMOTION OF ATTRACTION in EVERYTHING that you do. And that's all that really counts.

The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with WomenAnd if YOU are reading this right now and would like to do things RIGHT and GET the kind of SUCCESS like the first dude in this newsletter so that women will be pretty much begging you so they can be buying you lunch, fueling up your car, and will be smsing and calling you like crazy, because they are ATTRACTED to you, then I seriously suggest you download my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women, and do it IMMEDIATELY.

I was actually reading it again today and I can't BELIEVE how much POWERFUL and CLEAR INFORMATION I packed into this baby. This is a book you'll be coming back to again and again, even years from now.

Download it now at:
The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women book page

And if you have read the book, you are ready for the next level- where I will show you, IN PERSON, EXACTLY HOW THIS ALL WORKS.

From personally showing you how to create the right kind of teases on the fly, to how to build up trust and rapport, to how to use your body language and tonality to smoothly passing through women’s “tests” to spark attraction, to how to make her friends who are surrounding her feel great about you entering their dynamic, to showing you the best wardrobe makeover advice and how to understand what type of clothing will enhance your appeal, to an to an in-depth understanding of the aspects of women’s psychology and cultural conditioning that is CRITICAL to understand for success, you will gain the most advanced understanding on Earth of women and attraction and you will also be able to pick my mind and have all your questions answered. 

And if you would like to learn IN PERSON, you now have TWO great options to do that:

1. The Real World Bootcamp
In the Real World Bootcamp, I will serve as your exclusive instructor for three days and nights as you learn everything about pick up in real world venues such as taverns, bookstores, clubs, and the street. If you want to learn all the complex dynamics of attracting a woman and taking her through all the stages of the rollercoaster, then it's best to learn from someone who's actually "in the ring" on a regular basis and DOES it for real, and knows what he's talking about so that he can fill in all the CONTEXT that's missing from what you might be reading elsewhere. You can now do that in my ONE-ON-ONE bootcamps where I will work exclusively with you in real venues such as clubs, malls, streets, cafes, and even trains and buses.

The bootcamp will get you to where you want to be in the most efficient manner possible. I'll teach you HOW to deal with all the unpredictable situations that can arise, I'll show you HOW to deal with challenges such as loud music where it's difficult to be heard, and HOW to actually isolate girls, HOW to deal with her friends, and of COURSE how to pick up in daytime as well. And you'll also get to learn how to REALLY create a natural vibe to the whole interaction so that she doesn't feel weird about meeting you the next time.

I wish somebody could have taught me all this stuff at one shot over a weekend instead of having to learn it piece by piece, from various different guys and from tons of my own mistakes and experiences over YEARS. During those years, it was often like walking blindfolded into the lion's cage, where I got ripped apart. If you want to avoid the feeling of being punched in from all sides at once, and if you want to learn as fast as possible, I recommend you sign up for the bootcamp as soon as you can. Go to:
Bootcamp Information Page

3.The Dating Wizard Live Seminar
If you want to learn HOW to do all this in a comfortable seminar style environment, then I recommend my DATING WIZARD LIVE SEMINAR, June 11th-12th, Toronto.

This is your chance to get the most advanced understanding and skill on this topic on earth. This is not a seminar where I am just talking, I will be interacting with you, taking your questions, and there will even be a component of the seminar where clients get to prove that what they have learned actually works, as they pick up women for real.

To find out more, go to:
Live Seminars Information Page

Till next time,
Michael W.

 

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This work is copyrighted by the author. No unauthorized duplication or presentation allowed. Copyright © 2006 The Dating Wizard All Rights Reserved

 

 

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