|
Michael W - The Dating
Wizard: The Spell To Dating Success
The Dating Wizard Newsletter Signup
You Can Learn the Most Powerful, Closely
Guarded Secrets For Attracting Women Anywhere, Anytime, No Matter How
Beautiful! This article is a small part of the information contained in the
ebook "The Dating Wizard: Secrets To Success With Women". You will learn how
to reclaim your masculinity and show the confidence that you've seen in guys
that are popular, and successful, with women. For samples and more
information visit
The Dating Wizard Website The best pick-ups don't
seem like pickups at all. Important, this.
There's a reason: A woman who is attractive is not looking to get
"picked-up", with all the negative implications of that word. And
besides, if you are REALLY the “PRIZE”, then you shouldn’t be so keen
on “picking up” a woman till you KNOW more about her.
Makes sense, doesn’t it?
YOUR reality should be just as AWESOME as HER reality.
And let me tell you one thing about an attractive woman’s reality:
Women who are attractive ALREADY HAVE TOO MANY numbers, too many guys
who won't stop calling, etc., etc.
If all YOU have to offer is that are willing to "pick her up", in many
cases you're not going to get very far. You must do everything in your
power to NOT look like you are trying to "pick up" a woman. The best
way to not LOOK like you are trying to pick up a woman is to actually
NOT be trying to pick her up.
You should instead by INTERACTING with her. Some people call this
SOCIALIZING.
The only time to “pickup” is when the interaction is going along SO
WELL, so smoothly, that it just seems NATURAL to take it to the "next
level", whether it's to chat for some more, go for a coffee or a walk,
kiss her, or to arrange to meet up later if you have no time at the
moment.
There are actually three things going wrong when a guy is trying too
hard to “pick up” a woman:
1. She already has many guys to choose from and doesn't feel needy for
any more.
2. It makes her feel slutty if she goes along with a guy's attempts to
"pick her up" without even knowing her. This makes her feel guilty and
cheap thus she will ignore the attempt to pick her up.
3. She also figures that if you were as desirable as HER, you wouldn't
be so quick to want someone for sex. And let's face it, if you don't
know a thing about her, and you still want her number or to take her
for a coffee, what else can she possibly think you're interested in
her for?
Don't get me wrong- I'm not saying to act as if you have no sexuality.
And I'm not saying to go on for hours in conversation before getting
sexual at all. What I am saying is that you have to have timing, and
you have to have more than JUST sexuality.
You can't SKIP that stage
called "getting to KNOW someone". Otherwise your "sexuality" comes
across as "desperation".
It's funny actually, when you think about it, because once you raise
your OWN standards, all this becomes OBVIOUS.
But most guys really have way-too-low standards. Any chick that LOOKS
attractive and WHAMMO, it's like "Oh man, gotta have her". Not good.
That’s scarcity thinking.
There's an interesting
irony:
As guys get more successful with women, they stop being CONSCIOUS of
all the strategies and yet they only get more and more successful.
The reason why is because in many ways, all that has happened is that
they have naturally adopted the attitude of not actively SEARCHING for
women, because they ALREADY HAVE more than they can handle. Plus,
their new-found confidence often translates into a more fun
personality, more humor, more good natured teasing, more challenge,
more excitement. And about a bazillion other subtle things in body
language and tonality that are beyond the scope of this one
newsletter.
This is why a guy who is REALLY good-natured, confident, funny, etc,
can get away with what SEEMS on the surface to be FAR OUT ways to
start a conversation with a woman. It works for him because the
SUBTLETIES of his tonality, his expression on his face, all say "I'M A
FUN AND DESIRABLE PERSON AND I AIN'T NEEDY ONE BIT".
Who WOULDN'T enjoy being in the presence of THE MAN?
Guys who are successful with women are not even thinking so much about
“picking up” a woman they happen to meet – rather, their attitude is
that they won't mind a FUN conversation and FINDING OUT WHAT SHE'S
ABOUT.
And then, if she seems like she is a person they might like to get to
know better, THEN they might decide to move things to the next stage
and go for a coffee or get her number, etc.
Guess what?
Now these guys are finally thinking the way an attractive woman
thinks, they are finally thinking the way they SHOULD have been
thinking all along!
That attitude solves all three problems mentioned at the start:
1. The fact that she has lots of guys is no longer an obstacle because
by your slower approach, by your attitude and mannerisms, and not
skipping the "getting to know you" stage, YOU imply to her that
you are not necessarily GOING to pick her up. Instead you are just
going to SOCIALIZE.
SOCIALIZING is the great excuse for just about anything in this
society.
I actually believe this is a dangerous thing, but hey you have to deal
with reality as it is to have any effect on that reality.
Onward:
Once you are socializing, you might FIND OUT that you do want to get
to know her. BOTH of you are OPEN to the idea of getting to KNOW a
potentially really cool person. A cool person doesn't skip stages, and
you are not rushing things. You're just there to socialize and find
out if she MIGHT be a good overall match, and you are there of course
to also convey a bit about yourself.
2. The second problem, the "slut factor" is taken care of as well.
Since you are first just chatting and getting to know each other, she
doesn't feel slutty if, after this stage, you decide to move things to
the next level.
By the way, this is why if you do get an email or phone number after
just a couple of minutes, you should think of it as just a stepping
stone to your real conversation which will happen later. Nothing is
sealed yet. You can't skip stages. (unless you're with a really
strange girl or a party girl who really could care less about anything
besides having fun NOW.)
3. By slowing things down and not getting to the "pick up" part so
fast, you are implying that YOU have choices as well and that
therefore you are not needy either. Notice how simply having the
attitude that you are THE MAN who ALREADY has everything, and who has
high standards, solves everything.
Everything traces back to superiority.
I believe one of the reasons teasing a girl in a good-natured way
works is because it implies that you are not taking the initial
interaction too seriously and that you are not so quick to think she
is so great. You are putting her on an equal playing field where she
has to prove herself to you.
In other words, you are demonstrating that you are pretty cool and
superior yourself. But if you go too far and act mean, you then are
coming across as either having a psychological DEFECT, or having
social attitude problems, both of which are signs of inferiority and
not attractive.
Let's end off with a practical example:
You're at the 7-Eleven. A girl in front of you is buying a Coke.
You're a bit sly and say to her, "Hey, if you want to get high, you
don't need to resort to Coke. You should try natural alternatives,
like talking to me, for instance."
You could play with this one in a million ways, everything from being
a "Coke dealer" who deals with Natural Coke and Diet Coke, to telling
her that you don't trust her because she's probably a caffeine junkie.
Notice how NONE of this is actually "picking her up" or touching her,
or kissing up to her, etc.
It's MUTUALLY ENJOYING a social interaction. So that you can
eventually move on to "getting to know someone" if you desire to do
so. And eventually move on to "getting sexual", etc.
You might decide after a few minutes of this, if you are enjoying the
interaction, to say "hey, it's a hot day outside, let's take a stroll
to the Slurpee section" or "let's discuss this some more with a stroll
around the block".
At first the idea of taking things to the next stage might seem like a
"conscious" thought to you, as if you are PUSHING your comfort limits,
but after a while, you'll realize that it actually makes sense and you
will not even THINK about it anymore.
Also, pushing your comfort limits is a HUGE part of becoming THE MAN.
Let me give you a secret:
The best guys in anything all pushed their comfort limits a LOT.
 And if you haven't yet downloaded my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets
to Success with Women, then do that immediately. This book lays the
roadmap that you need for taking things all the way from how to meet
women to getting physical and relationships. This book is where it all
begins, your foundation to your incredible future with women.
Download it now at:
The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women book page
And to take the NEXT STEP, I recommend you take advantage of my
ADVANCED SERVICES tailored for your particular goals:
If you'd like to learn how to approach women in real environments, go
to:
Bootcamp Information Page
And if you would like a personal one-to-one consultation, either in
person or on the phone, about ANY matter related to dating, you can
now do that. Just go to:
The Dating Wizard Website
Till next time,
Michael W.
|
 |
New articles every
week!
|
Today's Question
