Michael W - The Dating Wizard: The Spell To Dating Success
Read more about The Dating Wizard here
- Go beyond rote line memorization and understand the difference of dating
and of being "The Man" when it comes to seducing women.
Michael W: I've got some great news for you, and that is that there actually IS truth to the idea that women DO want "the real you", but the challenge is understanding what this actually MEANS.
To understand what women mean by this, the best analogy I can give you is to imagine you had a great computer that was affected by some computer virus, spyware, etc.
So, now, this naturally great computer that was performing so well for you and doing everything, in fact doing MANY things perfectly all at ONCE, is suddenly ALL SCREWED UP, it's going super slow, it's not even responding. You have to close up every window to make available some more power and memory to the function you need most.
Now, all you really want is your computer back to NORMAL. Because the truth is, your computer operating at "normal" is actually an incredible achievement, doing billions of things all at once at light-speed, and doing these things all perfectly.
Well, the truth is that EVERY HUMAN BEING is eventually "affected" with SOME type of "computer virus" but it's happening on a PSYCHOLOGICAL level, and it's the product of FAULTY perceptions of reality.
These viruses, they are IMPLANTED with very SNEAKY tactics, you don't SEE them coming, they can be the WELL INTENTIONED yet STILL VERY DAMAGING product of culture, friends, family and even of your own incorrect understandings about women and about yourself and about human beings.
When it comes to being successful with women, a guy running into problems doesn't realize that the problem is often ARTIFICIAL, the result of his own perspectives. The reason it feels so REAL is because the artificial, incorrect, just plain wrong perspectives are fuelled and created in the first place by EMOTIONS. And once you have emotion behind something, you really THINK that whatever you are feeling is PERFECTLY JUSTIFIED.
And so one huge part of becoming great with women is learning to DETOX yourself of the "viruses" which are the WRONG BELIEFS you have about women, about yourself, and what a woman thinks of you, about what she might mean when she says something, etc.
Absolutely no one is perfect, because we are always being exposed to all kinds of damaging stuff, but the GOOD news is that there are ways to CLEAN up your mind just like there are ways to clean up your computer hard drive of viruses, etc. Also, there are ways to make your mind far more RESISTANT to the wrong beliefs, thoughts, etc, which will help you KEEP you in the right state of confidence, security, and overall "sexy vibe" that is attractive to women and that you see in all guys who are "naturals" with women.
Before I get into the solution, let me just show exactly how all this applies in real life, with an email that just came in yesterday:
***LETTER FROM A READER***
Hi Michael,
I've studied a lot of dating material, but yours seems the most perceptive to me. You're the only "attraction teacher" whose advice I trust. That's why I'm writing this message.
An attractive woman recently started working at my company. I know that a romance with a co-worker can be problematic, but I also know people who have done it successfully.
Anyway, I was pleased with how I was communicating with her (i.e., being "The Man" from the start). She seemed to enjoy me and kept initiating conversations with me.
But yesterday I made a mistake. I felt rejected by something she said, and I seemed uncomfortable as a result. I didn't say anything mean to her, but it crushed my confidence. I became more withdrawn and lost the great vibe that I'd been giving off.
I'm really annoyed with myself for letting it affect me, but I've always had a problem being emotionally non-reactive. Especially when it comes to the shame of perceived rejection.
My question is: If you misstep and show a side of yourself that's not "The Man" to a woman who had been digging you, does that immediately kill your chance with her? Or can you recover from it?
I'm not suffering from "one-itis", but I really don't want to have blown it like that. If it's that easy to completely lose a woman that quickly, it seems impossible for me to sustain attraction for long. I'd appreciate any advice you offer me.
Thank You,
T.J.
>>>MY REPLY<<<
First of all, thanks for the kind words. Also, yes, I absolutely do suggest avoiding office romances. That being said, let's get to responding to your situation:
Now, I want to give you PROPS and credit for being MAN enough to acknowledge WHAT the problem is.
99 percent of guys will never even get to this point, they will instead go their entire lives saying that everything is being caused by outside forces and play the blame game. These are the same guys who go around putting everyone down who gets any good results in their life.
You are realizing that the issue here is that you are feeling that gut-level SINKING feeling that DESTROYS the all important VIBE that you create by being "The MAN" as I explain in my materials. You are GETTING the initial results, the women are responding to you with attraction, they are initiating the conversations, and keep showing you that the "window" is OPEN for you, if you just CONTINUE to BE that MAN.
I have a feeling you are probably getting this initial attraction simply from reading my newsletters, and if you would get my premium programs you would get the answers to your questions in full level detail, but for right now, let me do my best to get into the answer.
You mention that you "felt rejected by something she said" and that you "seemed uncomfortable as a result."
Absolutely, my man. I get the sense that you also feel in hindsight that whatever she said was NOT something mean.
Now, if I am wrong, and she DID in fact do something that was clearly disrespectful, you should drop her immediately. But I get the feeling that this is NOT what happened, that you REALIZE she did nothing wrong, but because you FELT that somehow that she wasn't giving you her approval, that somehow you were sinking in her eyes, and that somehow life was now painful and sucky, you reacted in a way that showed you felt inferior, and you were no longer the cool, relaxed, fun guy that was secure.
And women can DETECT the CHANGE in the emotional "frequency" of your vibes IMMEDIATELY.
In fact, when you develop yourself to mastery level, you will be able to detect the exact frequency of what's going on emotionally with her INSTANTLY as well. You will know EXACTLY what's going on, and what to do about it. It will be EASY, it will not be some kind of "thinking" it will be an INSTINCT for you.
However, the good news is that you are AWARE of the problem, you say yourself that you've "always had a problem being emotionally non-reactive."
Also, by the way, screwing up once or twice is not a problem, but the reality is that unless you take care of the underlying issue, it WILL repeat itself endlessly, and ruin what you have with a great woman.
So, here's where the CRUCIAL work comes in:
If you want to get to the point where you are IMPERVIOUS to this stuff, so that you are STILL that totally cool, chilled, fun, charismatic guy, even when she says or does these things that LOGICALLY know are innocent but you FEEL are somehow some form of rejection, then the first thing you need to do is change your attitude from wanting to AVOID these situations to TRYING TO TOTALLY IMMERSE YOURSELF in these kinds of "uncomfortable" situations!
CHANGE your goal from wanting to have an interaction with a woman to be FREE of whatever it is that triggered that negative emotion in you, to WANTING to have TONS of interactions with women or a woman does this ALL THE TIME.
That's your new GOAL.
This makes a MASSIVE difference to your OWN psychology.
You now won't be looking to get women to say things you LIKE, you are going to be looking for women to say WHATEVER the heck they say while YOU remain in GREAT STATE.
That's the goal.
It takes the pressure off, since you are no
longer even SHOOTING for her approval,
you are now simply SHOOTING for
YOUR OWN STATE OF MIND TO
STAY STRONG in the PRESENCE
of what you used to PERCEIVE as
ANYTHING "negative".
You have to realize that the goal is the construction of a SUPER STRONG YOU, that can attract just about any woman, as opposed to getting caught up on this ONE woman.
Once you fix this problem up, (if this is the only challenge you are facing - my materials will deal with EVERY aspect of attraction) then you will not only massively increase your chances of getting this woman, you will then have your choice from TONS of women.
So, again, the goal is for you to simply LOOK for these situations, and for every impulse you have to GIVE IN to the NEGATIVE emotions, and the resulting negative THOUGHTS, (because emotions create matching thoughts that further fuel that emotion) you must instead RESIST the urge to ACT on those negative impulses.
I'm not saying you can't FEEL the negative feeling at all, because that might be impossible at first. But you CAN resist the urge to LINGER on those negative thoughts, the urge to FOCUS on the negative thoughts, the urge to then DO something negative.
So for example, let's say in the past that negative emotion you would feel would then be followed by certain THOUGHTS. i.e. "All women are crazy", you have to then CONSCIOUSLY CHANGE YOUR INTERNAL DIALOGUE to something a lot more TRUE, even though your emotions might resist it.
Perhaps something like "there are all kinds of women, and I will find a great one, and also that I although I might not be perfect, no one is perfect, and yet I am a damn great man and I have just learned something from this interaction with this woman, and I will keep on learning from every interaction so that I am keep getting better at this skill."
If your internal dialogue was "I'm a loser,
I'm horrible" and then that made you pissed
so that you went on and on trying to find reasons
why you are NOT a loser, then the way to
CHANGE these thoughts is to again
IMMERSE yourself in these "fears of being
a loser" over and over again, so that you realize
that actually this too is just a CONSTRUCTED,
and totally ARTIFICIAL fear.
You can't RUN from your fears, they only get stronger that way. Instead, EMBRACE THE UNKNOWN, embrace that fear, and if you fear being a loser, then actually EMBRACE THE THOUGHT OF BEING A LOSER! And you will eventually find that this FEAR is total B.S.! You'll realize that it was the FEAR itself that was the problem, because the reality is that nobody really cares all that much what other people are, they are far too worried about their OWN insecurities!
But you won't realize this yourself till you EMBRACE the fear, till you let yourself imagine the fear at it's greatest extent over and over again, until it DIES.
If you have seen the movie "Terminator Two", there's this scene at the end where the evil Terminator is melting in a super hot liquid, but before he "dies", he gives keeps on changing form, his face goes through a dozen different contortions, each one looking freaky and scarier than the last, till finally it all FADES and he MELTS into nothingness.
This is the same with the fears you have regarding pick-up and women. At first, when you try to KICK THESE FEARS IN THE ASS, they will FIGHT BACK, they will look even SCARIER than ever, they will make you feel WORSE, but if you RESIST the urge to CATER to your fear, your fear will DIE.
If you give in to your fear by NOT approaching women, if you give in to your fear by ALLOWING the negative dialogue in your head, if you give in, then you STRENGTHEN the fear. It would be like getting scared by the scary terminator face and deciding to rescue it from the fire because otherwise it might escape anyway and be real angry at you and try to hurt you more. If you did that, the evil Terminator would just take advantage of that and destroy you.
The only way to control a fear is to DESTROY it, you can't "BEFRIEND" it.
But if you RESIST the urge to give in, then your internal self, your emotions keep getting STRONGER AND STRONGER and the dear suffocates, starves, crumbles, and dies.
SECOND of all, you have to also CHANGE your BEHAVIOURAL RESPONSES to to those emotions. This is why I prefer to work with guys in person, or on the phone, so I can find out more about the exact specifics and do a customized session tailor-made for the person.
So let's say that your previous behavioral response to the situation was to desperately search for approval from some other woman, what you should do INSTEAD is take a deep breath and RELAX all on your own and feel great with ZERO approval from ANY chick.
THIS is the way you will destroy the fear and destroy the habits that fuel the fear.
I'm not saying to EVER STAY with a woman who is disrespecting you, but you will never know if it's the woman or it's you until you become stronger. When you become really strong, you don't become stupid.
You will still know when a woman is mistreating you, but you will not be affected much by it. And of course, because you are then so strong, the women will love you way more, which is ironic because you will not need it to feel validated. You will then be able to truly choose the best woman because your mind won't be vulnerable to the machinations of a woman who preys on weak men.
I must let you know, however, that the work involved in this development is truly the stuff that separates the MEN from the BOYS.
This is going to be WORK.
If you want to get to the level of mastery, where it's all instinct, you have to be prepared to PUSH YOUR OWN "PAIN ZONE".
If you want the quick band-aid solution, I'm not the guy for you. If you just want to get a one night stand, you can do that easily without me, there are several guys who specialize in that stuff and will show you a few cute lines to give to women who are smashed and drunk and who are the kind of women who are looking for the short term only.
But if you are prepared to truly EMBRACE THE PAIN so that you can CHANGE YOUR LIFE AND YOUR FUTURE, FOREVER, then I am the man who will help you get there, and I will do this in the most efficient manner.
When you embrace the pain, it's similar to working out with weights. You simply CAN'T GET STRONGER by lifting the same weight you've always lifted in the past. Your body has no reason to. It's only by PUSHING BEYOND YOUR COMFORT ZONE, by telling your body that IT ABSOLUTELY MUST GET STRONGER, that it actually DOES.
Similarly, your EMOTIONS will NOT grow unless they absolutely HAVE TO.
This is why most relationships fail, what happens is that usually one or sometimes both parties refuses to EMBRACE the FACT of life that getting somewhere takes WORK, takes COMMITMENT, takes a willingness to EMBRACE some PAIN because it's the only way to GROW.
They indulge in their fantasy of something for nothing, they want "instant orgasm" even though they haven't invested the time and effort and genuine caring in developing intimacy and trust with the other person- and a lot of women are guilty of this as well, it's certainly not just men. We are living in times where people think relationships are just supposed to "happen" with zero time or emotions truly invested.
If you want to be STRONGER than the rest, if you want a woman to see that you are DIFFERENT than most men, be prepared to put in the work to BE stronger emotionally than most men. And of course, you should make sure to only be with a woman who is worthy of your development, a woman who has put equal work into developing her own fantastic characteristics.
If you keep INDULGING the negative emotions and habits and behaviors that are holding you back, they will NEVER go away. You will never GROW to become the MAN you were MEAN to be.
That's all that most women want- they want the AWESOME version of yourself that you were BEFORE you got the "COMPUTER VIRUS" ON YOUR BRAIN!
When you are free of that, your mind can process tons of things at once, you can be funny, charismatic, masculine, confident, sexual, intriguing, and have the right tonality and body language and much much more.
But when your mind is affected by the "virus", then your processor is all screwed up, it takes all your mental energy to just do ONE thing, even something like just basic TALKING seems hard when it's a really beautiful creature that is in front of you, never mind how much more challenging it can feel to ALSO have to be charming, masculine, dominant, witty, humorous, intriguing, relaxing, etc.
So if you want to CHANGE your life with women and you want to do it NOW, once and for all, so that you can start ENJOYING your life as soon as possible, then you need to order my Seduction Mastery Apprenticeship CD Program IMMEDIATELY.
This program is about REAL CHANGE within.
This is the program that has BLASTED all the other SUPERFICIAL-BASED programs out of the water. It will show you HOW to approach women and carry every step of the way including getting physical and having long-lasting attraction without you ever having to worry about ACTING.
It will feel NATURAL, because it IS.
It will be YOU without the "viruses".
It's here.
And if you haven't yet downloaded my eBook- The Dating Wizard:
Secrets to Success with Women, then do that now. It's got dozens of
ideas you can start using to meet women tonight. It's
here.
"The Dating Wizard's: Spell To Dating Success" article series. When you are able to accept that a woman might potentially not like you, you are then able to let go of being overly concerned with this fear.
This series of articles (listed here) are a
small part of the information contained in "The Secrets To Success With
Women (more info)" ebook and "The Seduction Mastery Apprentice Program
(more info)" on CD/DVD.
Wishing you success with women,
Michael
