Courtesy 'Double Your Dating' by
David D.
Visit the Double Your Dating website
www.doubleyourdating.com
I want to talk about the concept of "flirting", and why it's SO
important that you understand exactly what it is and how to do it with
women. To begin with, women know what flirting is, and they respond VERY
differently to flirting communication than they do to typical social
communication.
If you understand flirting and sexual tension, you can begin
conversations with women and have them INSTANTLY feeling ATTRACTION for
you.
If you DON'T understand how flirting and sexual tension work, then
you're either going to have to become famous or make a LOT of money to
be successful with women.
I'm going to suggest that you learn how to flirt well, then do it RIGHT
FROM THE BEGINNING in your interactions with women to SET THE RIGHT
TONE.
Think of flirting like playing.
Remember when you were a kid and you used to "play fight" with your
friends?
What's the difference between "play" wrestling and "real" wrestling?
And how do you know the difference when it's happening... when your
friend runs up and pushes you down, then jumps on you and tries to pin
you?
The answer is YOU JUST KNOW. It's obvious to humans (and other animals,
by the way) when someone is "playing" and when they're serious.
Flirting is similar.
If you start talking to a woman and say "Hi, you're very pretty. You
probably have a boyfriend, right?" in a normal tone of voice, you're NOT
flirting.
On the other hand, if you say "Hi, I realize that you're probably shy
because you get no attention from men... so I thought I'd come over here
and pay attention to you..." it's OBVIOUS that you're not being serious.
This is flirting.
By the way, flirting IS NOT simply telling jokes, or trying to be
"cute". One of the concepts that I teach is called "Cocky & Funny."
Cocky & Funny is simply a powerful, concentrated way of flirting and
creating sexual tension with a specific kind of humor.
It's so funny to me how some guys write in because they "can't see
themselves being Cocky & Funny around women" because they don't want to
come across as jerks. This really cracks me up... because it's obvious
to me that these guys JUST DON'T GET IT.
So let me explain this whole thing a different way...
If you know how to communicate the right way, women will respond to you
RIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING with a HIGH LEVEL of sexual interest and
ATTRACTION.
When you know how to incorporate flirting in a Cocky & Funny way, which
is really a form of "adult verbal play", you tune in to a certain
frequency in a woman's mind, and cause her to go into a very special
kind of emotional state.
One of the keys to effective flirting is to "get it". In other words,
you have to actually get out there and practice so you get a "feel" for
how it works.
I think a lot of guys give up when they try a cute line or technique and
a woman responds by saying "You're a loser." Instead of just realizing
that they need more practice or that the woman might have just been in a
bad mood or even one of those horrible "I don't have a sense of humor"
cases, they take it personally and decide to just have it mean that
they're a failure.
But take my word for it... once you learn how to flirt effectively and
communicate in the language of "adult play" you WILL SIMPLY NOT BELIEVE
how women will respond to you.
Here's an example of some of one of my favorite topics to "riff on" when
flirting... the topic of getting married and us being in a
relationship... and I'll give it to you in the form of a sample
dialogue. Keep in mind, I might have a conversation like this one with a
woman that I just met five minutes earlier...
Her: "I have a good job, and I make good money"
Me: "Nice. I like that in a woman. Want to get married? We could leave
for Vegas right now and be married in about 4 or 5 hours. I need a woman
with money."
Her: <Laughter> "OK, that sounds like a plan"
Me: "But wait a minute... do you think you can support the both of us on
your income? I really want to be a stay at home husband... you know,
keep an eye on the TV and such."
Her: "Oh, no... I won't support you."
Me: "Well, then I'm breaking up with you. It's over between us. I was
going to marry you, then divorce you a week later and take half your
money."
Her: <Laughter> "You can't break up with me! I'm not even your
girlfriend."
Me: "That's all the more reason."
...do you get what's going on here?
I'm taking a normal conversation
topic (her job and income) and redirecting the conversation in a
flirtatious, Cocky & Funny way to create a fun mood and sexual tension (by
suggesting marriage, divorce, and breaking up over her not supporting me,
etc.).
If the above example doesn't make any sense to you, then take that as a sign
that you need to get out and practice more. Try it on a waitress or two.
When you ask for something and she says "I'm sorry, we don't have that",
just say "OK, this relationship isn't working out... I'm going to have to
break up with you."
In fact, you can say this in just about ANY situation with ANY woman where
she's saying something that you don't like, and it's funny.
When you communicate like this, you're FLIRTING, you're TEASING, and you're
initiating a DIFFERENT KIND OF COMMUNICATION than most men initiate. And as
soon as the woman you're talking to "engages" you in this kind of dialogue,
THE GAME IS ON.
There are a LOT of ways you can flirt, and a lot of ways you can be Cocky &
Funny that DON'T REQUIRE WORDS.
If a woman looks at you and raises one eyebrow, look back at her and do the
same... only exaggerate it.
If a woman puts her hand on your arm, look down at it, then look up at her
in a surprised way, then raise your eyebrows as if you just had a major "ah
ha!" realization... then start smiling and nodding your head as if you just
realized that she wants you. This is a powerful combination because it's
funny, and it exaggerates the meaning in her touching you.
There are a MILLION ways to flirt like this, but the point that I'm trying
to make is that you NEED TO START DOING IT RIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING OF YOUR
INTERACTIONS WITH WOMEN.
It will set off all of your conversations with women on the right foot, and
start a dialogue that creates sexual tension and ATTRACTION.
If you DON'T learn how to communicate with women like this you'll have
BORING, "NORMAL" conversations that NEVER lead to sexual tension and
ATTRACTION.
Remember, women can tell INSTANTLY whether you're flirting with them or not.
If you are, and you're doing it in a subtle, charming way, you'll get
amazing responses. One of the keys to flirting and creating ATTRACTION
effectively is projecting confidence and indifference both in your voice
tone and body language as you do it.
And in order to project these things you need to have the right
understanding and BELIEFS about how male/female ATTRACTION works... and then
be able to project them through your conversation to women.
In my CD audio series, I explain the most important beliefs to project, and
exactly how to project them so the woman you're talking to senses INSTANTLY
and at an UNCONSCIOUS level that you know how to communicate on many levels
with her... all through body language, voice tone, and words.
Of course, I also teach many, many ways to tease, use Cocky & Funny, and
flirt with women... including all of my personal favorites. One great
benefit of listening to the audio series is that you can ACTUALLY HEAR ME
LIVE teaching how I communicate. As you can imagine, this is basically
priceless.
And if you haven't gone and downloaded my online eBook "Double Your Dating",
then you need to get your ass in gear and do that right now. You can
download it and be reading it in just a few minutes from right now. Get it
here:
www.doubleyourdating.com
- just follow the 'ebook' link and download your copy. This book and the
three bonuses that come with it are the FOUNDATION for success with women.
Everything you read in these articles will make more sense once you have
read the book.
...and read it, learn it, and use it.
Talk to you soon,
David D.
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