Let’s gather together and create some interesting steam to power through the usual ugly breaks of silence that kill any type of connection you may have (almost) had. Here are some news articles from the past week to get you through the conversation with something fun to say:

- Apple’s Siri is going to take over your life. Yup, you’re going to rely on her to keep your home warm, or cold, appropriately, as well as write your emails and help you buy things. If you don’t have an iphone 4s now you’re going to be sorry. If you do score extra success points as you retell this story with real-time examples.

- Porn producers offer easy cash is just a variation of the Nigerian Email Scam with the added benefit of physical threats and no overdraft protection.

- “Ass-man has a new definition”. So there’s this guy that happens to have in his possession a part of Saddam Hussein’s bronze ass and he can’t sell it off at auction, not for lack of bids (supposedly) but for a lack of “high enough” bids. Then the Iraqi Consulate hears of this and they want the piece of ass back – because it’s a piece of “cultural history”. One can only guess what they’ll do with it but you can bet it won’t be the first guy’s idea of “art”!

- Do you remember the flag with the snake on it “Don’t tread on me” it said? Well, the game maker Saga has gone it one better with games that say “Pee on me”. Seriously. “Toylets” are urinal game consoles pitting one man’s strength 9of stream) against another. Ugh. I hope they aren’t planning on any “mixed couples” games…. LOL. The curiously named “The Northern Wind, the Sun and Me” is designed to stimulate a player’s interest in the opposite sex. The aim is to blow a girl’s skirt up and reveal her underwear, with the harder the player urinating, the harder the wind blowing.

Meet someone special.
Have a great weekend!

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That is my online dating motto. Too many times I’ve received emails from the broken-hearted about an online affair ruined when the moment of the face-to-face meeting happens.

Life doesn’t have just it’s ups and downs, it has it’s high-flying winning moments and it’s bottom-of-the-barrel-scrapings too.

Find your backbone and don’t settle… you’ll do fine.

For your online personal ad use this:
“I might take one step back but I always take two steps forward!”

Have a great day!

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How many times in your life have you heard that phrase?

One too many, I’m sure.

In this consumer world of ours it’s hard to separate the things we need to be happy from the things we’re told we need to be happy. Now, I’m not saying that we should all become minimalists or “free-gans” by any means, but maybe, just maybe, there’s one thing we could take out of our lives that wouldn’t cause total chaos when it’s gone.

Think about this today and see if you can identify that one thing.

For your personal ad headline today give this a go:
“I’m open to new possibilities, just not anything weird.”

Have a great day!

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Ganna A by Met-Art

Yes, I watch the stock market and at this time of the year there is often a few weird selling patterns that appear consisting of the everyday man-woman-investor cashing in to pay the anticipated bills of the season.

I’m not talking just cash for gift buying. Business people need cash (liquidity) for the new calendar year, parents need to pay the bills for the upcoming school semester. Hell, maybe a guy plans for a very special Valentine’s Day to be pre-paid after the big marriage proposal surprise on Christmas Eve (I did that one).

Sadly, the world markets are out of control, real investor values are all over the board and that doesn’t include the run on the stock market still to come, knocking of hundreds from the stock market indexes in what are normally slow, almost no ripple trading sessions until after the new year.

And all of this leads up to the stories you need to know about so you have some awesome current events to share at the dreaded office party or that lonely corner bar stool tonight. Read and enjoy, here we go!

- Too sexy for that veggie. An Islamic cleric living in Europe reportedly has warned Muslim women not to get too close to bananas, cucumbers or other produce — to avoid having “sexual thoughts.” Hahahahaha ho. Gotta wonder which “western video” sent this cleric holy man onto this particular line of thought. I know it’s not the same guy that said women shouldn’t drive because it may affect their virginity.

- “I never intended to break the rules.” For a final payout of $12.1 million dollars I wouldn’t know too much about my bankrupt company either. Just saying….

- This is the guy in the running for Last Place Criminal Dufus of the yYear. There’s a video, below, too. But essentially dude snoops on his girlfriend’s teen daughter’s phone, found a nude pick of her and sexted the picture to almost 40 of her contacts to “teach her a lesson”. I can only guess that a couple of the kids might say the photo is old news but this guy has a fun time in store for the holidays and I hope he remembers his “soap on a rope”.

- Where would we be without a heart-fely gift shopping story? Right here is the answer. Dude with a .322 blood alcohol level is arrested for trying to steal 2 big screen TVs from Wal-Mart while he’s wearing the same coat he stole two days earlier from said store. They never said if it was the booze or the greed that gave him away. Too bad, one of those TVs was supposed to be my holiday gift!

- This will not be abused because it’s lobbyists and politicians making gift giving rules for lobbyists and politicians to receive gifts from one and another in time to give and receive this holiday season. Albeit belatedly because the new rules start January 1, 2012. State lawmakers and city council members can accept expensive gifts from lobbyists without disclosure if they are dating, and can receive meals and lodging in lobbyists’ homes without telling the public, under rules approved Thursday by the state ethics agency.

I told you it was a special time of year.

Note: Photo of Ganna A. by Antonio Clemens at Met-Art.

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Charlie Sheen Adult Costume Kit

TSA Will Reportedly Fire Agent Who Wrote ‘Get Your Freak On’ After Finding Sex Toy. If the traveler wants to get her freak on don’t leave messages in her luggage cheering her on. And when you work for the TSA you will get caught and you will be fired for bringing to notice a passenger’s personal sex toy. Better hope the Chinese cookie factory is hiring fortune cookie writers, numbnuts.

FX picks up Charlie Sheen sitcom. Yes, he’s coming back!!! Sheen and his production team announced that they were working on the pilot this summer, but FX has just revealed that they’ve picked the show up and ordered 10 episodes. Sheen has “come up with a wonderful, hilarious vehicle for Charlie’s acting talents—and a character we are very much looking forward to seeing him play,” FX Networks president and general manager John Landgraf says in a statement. “Two and a Half Men has been an outstanding component of FX’s schedule for the past 14 months, and we have every confidence that Anger Management will soon be as well.”

Sometimes you don’t stop all of the ‘bargain shoppers’ but eventually they get busted. Property crime detectives said the suspect knew about weaknesses and soft spots in Target’s security operation and used the knowledge to his advantage. The theft suspect would just load the items into a shopping cart and walk out, police said. Detectives had a trailer full of stolen evidence from the man’s residence. They seized movies, video games, clothing, electronics, and even crayons, to name a few things.

Sexy, funny costumes make Halloween good time for romance: survey. Romance might not be the first thing you think of in relation to Halloween, but a new survey shows it ranks favourably as a time to meet a potential mate. There are a few reasons for this, such as that men are likely to be attracted to someone wearing a sexy costume, while women like seeing someone in a funny outfit.

Pictures From The Best Internet Party Of The Year: Hallowmeme Photo gallery.

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Free Membership at Lavalife: Where Singles Click!

I’ll be honest, if the police came to me and asked me where I was last Tuesday I wouldn’t have an answer for them. I have no idea what I did three days ago. I would hope that there was something in my calendar/appointment book or written on a scrap of paper that I haven’t yet thrown out.

How is your own memory? As bad as mine or do you remember details that are easily recalled when needed?

There are, of course, may drugs and supplements that are described as memory aids but I’m not convinced that my memory needs help. I prefer to think that I am keeping my head clear of trivia and lesser required details so that I have ‘storage’ available for more important items that will need to be recalled at a later time.

I don’t really know why i shared this with you, it seemed important when I was writing out a list of topics to write about. Maybe the reason will come to me later.

For your headline to use with your online dating profile try this:
“Our first date will be memorable, where shall we meet?”

Have a great day!

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