3. Lead Strong or
Play Along
Getting their team of ‘alphas’ to follow without question was a
challenge for each project manager. Some ruled with an iron fist,
others used manipulation and guilt. Some didn’t handle it at all.
In episode 11, Wes took the lead in a task to create an ad campaign
for Levi’s Jeans. Maria, one of his teammates, thought she had this
task together and angrily told Wes to back off, while she seized
control.
Maria was so busy throwing her weight around, she missed the primary
focus of jeans advertising… the ‘butt shots’. This single oversight
cost the team dearly. Later, in The Boardroom, Wes was fired for
failing to control Maria,,, and she was fired for posing as a
know-it-all. Two for the price of one turned out to be all in a
day’s work for Mr. Donald Trump.
On this and dating. One of the things we teach our students in
workshops is to lead and never hesitate. When a student sees strong
indications of interest it is his responsibility to act on them and
follow up. If a student fails to lead than the interest level will
soon drop to a very low level quickly. Learning to Play along can
also be taken as a way to see the signals and be aware of them. When
somebody is showing interest it’s best to play along and let them be
interested than giving them something else.
4. Step Up; Take Responsibility
Finger-pointing was rampant among teams on the Apprentice. If you
were really slick about it, laying blame off on one of your
teammates could help you survive another day. If you weren’t… oh
well.
This is a common thing I see with some students when I hear about
what they have done before working with Fidentia in a workshop. They
fail to take responsibility for their own actions. This is done in
so many ways its crazy. First if they have a bad date they blame the
date a lot, where they went, what they did, others around yet they
never look at themselves and wonder if they could have done anything
different to improve the situation. The only way to learn from
mistakes is to first realize you made a mistake in the first place.
Another example is guys who use different systems for dating. There
are many programs out there. I can make ALL of them work. When a
student can not make something work. They tend to first want to
blame the system instead of themselves. So they are on a constant
search of dating systems never realizing that each system has had
some students have success. They can not learn if they do not take
responsibility for their own actions.
5. Resist the Impulse to Be Impulsive
The game provides that the winning project manager receive an
exemption from firing should his or her team lose the following week
an Apprentice "Get Out of Jail Free" card.
Bradford won week one… but lost in week two. He had clearly been the
hardest working and most productive on his team and Mr. Trump seemed
to especially favor him. Moreover, he had the exemption and could
not be fired. All he had to do was sit back and make insightful
comments about his teammates.
But Bradford let his cockiness get in the way of sound business
judgment. He bragged to Mr. Trump that he was so confident of his
performance he was willing to give up his exemption.
Trump accepted Bradford’s offer… and then fired him, for making an
unwise and impulsive decision. It was a harsh, but instructive
consequence for acting in a rash manner.
One of the things I can think of with this is somebody who is too
impulsive is not paying attention to others. A relationship is a two
way street involving both parties. When somebody is being impulsive
and the other person isn’t respective than this creates a dead end.
6. Instill Confidence in Your Team
Both of the final two contestants, Kelly and Jennifer M,
demonstrated how to respect and inspire their co-workers. Choosing
people you trust and with whom you have mutual respect goes a long
way toward success.
In the final episode, eight of the previously fired teammates were
brought back to become the support team for the final task. Jennifer
and Kelly were allowed to take turns choosing their team members.
Kelly took a stronger role with his team, expecting more of each of
them, while Jennifer delegated the heavy lifting to herself.
In the end, both sets of teams did a great job for their PMs, but
Kelly’s team proved more loyal and spoke more highly of his
leadership abilities. Their confidence in him had an impact on the
final outcome.
This can be taken in installing confidence in who you are attracted
to. When you are interested in them and extremely confident. Others
will feel your true feelings. When they can feel your feelings they
will mirror them. Who wants to be around somebody who takes away
their confidence?
7. Watch What You Say
Both talking too much and saying the wrong thing can hurt you in
business. Jennifer C was an example of both errors and their
consequences.
Every time she appeared in The Boardroom, Jennifer was admonished by
both Mr. Trump and his property manager, Carolyn, for talking when
she should have been listening to others.
Later, after making a demeaning comment about two women customers in
an episode, she was booted from the show. To add injury to her
insult, when the show finally aired, she was also fired from her
real world job for that comment.
This applies to dating with the idea of listening is just as
important as talking. Telling somebody they are pretty when they are
trying to make a point and have something important to say is not
what they want to hear. The same would go for things such a negative
hits or being cocky and funny which are terms used in the seduction
community.
A negative hit is a slight insult which is supposed to be insulting
but not seem like you meant it. I do not usually endorse this. It is
to try to convey you are not really interested in your target person
to let their guard down.
Somebody who is being very cocky and funny can do so at the wrong
time too. When a person is showing signs of interest they are asking
for rapport. Giving them answers that are cocky and funny will
actually break rapport and chase a lot of people away.
8. Know When to Listen
During another visit to The Boardroom, Trump chastised (National
Debate Champion) Andy for not standing up and arguing in his own
behalf. Andy shot back to Mr. Trump that part of being a debate
champ is in knowing when to talk and when to listen.
A short and sweet argument that paid off.
I think this and how it applies to dating and seduction is very
obvious. Listening is a key part of communication.
9. Keep it
Strictly Business
Viewers were told over and over that The Apprentice contestants were
culled from over a million applicants and were said to be the best
of the very best. This being so, one wouldn’t expect the male
participants to lose their composure when attractive women crossed
their paths, mid-task. And yet, there was Raj. In addition to an
unending stream of inappropriate comments, Raj stopped just short of
a butt wiggle and a "woooo, whooo " whenever a beautiful woman was
within ten feet.
And while this behavior did not directly lead to his being fired, it
did (often) cause him to lose focus and take his eye off the prize.
In fact, Raj was ultimately fired for letting an important detail
slide making sure the toilet was installed in a home he was charged
with remodeling.
This is a little bit more difficult to summarize for dating.
Somebody who lacks focus tends to lack drive. When you really have a
goal in mind going after 20 different things usually gets somebody
nowhere.
10. Avoid Showing Your A**
This one should be a no-brainer, but since it actually happened,
maybe not.
Fairly late in the game, in episode 13, Ivana was desperate for a
win. Clutching at straws, she offered to pull down her skirt and
flash her underwear to a strange businessman on the street if he
would pay her twenty dollars for a candy bar worth one dollar. He
did… and then she did…
So, it was no surprise that Ivana wound up in The Boardroom, having
to explain this gaff to Mr. Trump. She claimed her action as a
‘gimmick.’ But this taught us another valuable lesson know when you
have done something inappropriate and face it head on. When she
refused to acknowledge that she crossed a line, the shock, dismay
and controversy surrounding her behavior was palpable.
Well this is true but there is a time to show you’re a** and a time
not to show your assets. When you first meet somebody common sense
says don’t take off your pants as the first things you do when
introducing yourself.
To summarize all of this a lot of the rules that help somebody get
ahead in business can also help them get ahead dating others.
Take a look at the website
http://www.badboycoaching.com/dating_advice.htm for more info.
To learn more about “The Apprentice” go to
http://www.NBC.com
Copyright © 2005 Robert Torrey All Rights Reserved Reprint rights restricted.
http://www.badboycoaching.com
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