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How To Date A Vampire

 

count of transylvania, vampire, heritage collection,When a vampire has your interest, how do you proceed?

Dating a vampire (vampiress = female) requires special care due to the unique circumstances that face human beings when found in this type of relationship in the beginning stages.

For instance: you don't invite a vampire over for an Italian style meal, it's just not done. Even a hint of some exotic herbs and garlic hidden in even the most tempting of foods is enough to melt your fanged-love-rocket into the linoleum.

Gothic Vampire Plus Elite Collection Adult While it's most likely that you first laid eyes on your Upir (wicked vampire) at a popular late-night destination it's just as likely that he has stalked you to public ground that you pass through in the late evening hours. Most vampires, being of the male of the species, believes in "occurring instances of common understanding", that being they like to find a way to impress you, through words or deeds, before asking you on a date.

Common vampire pickup lines include:
- let me help you with that ...
- you have nice pearly skin
- isn't this a wonderful time of night?
- can I buy you another?

Vampires, despite common recent idealizations, aren't very suave. Hanging around late at night, often with drunks and/or other vampires, is the cause of their ineptitude at the "pickup".

Your first introduction to him will be heart-inspiring. Vampires have the ability to reach inside dreams and allow you to a waking vision of your most positive dream that now includes him. You may lose just a second or two but you'll be filled with the feeling of deja-vu, that this has all happened before. His attraction force will be irresistible.

Always, and this is a must, carry your own drink from the bar, or retrieve it yourself from the trusted person that is pouring. Your 'falling-in-love vampire' may want you with all of his dark heart, but trust not to his honest intentions. Should he find another that sparks his fancy a little more than you do, he mat drug you to be rid of you without confrontation.

Depending on the circumstances and environment he may ask you to dance. Always a slow dance. Slow, somber music to remember happier, more 'humanly times', if only for a moment or two. He will invite you to sit with him, he'll usually have a table or seating that affords a premium view of the central surroundings. He will talk with you, intelligently. Vampires do not 'moon' over the women they show interest in, they proceed to allow women the voice and ear of an equal (although this is not their true belief). Drink will be plenty but food will be sparse, if offered at all. The undead have no need of a regular daily calorie intake.

The male vampire (often represented by the slavic word 'hawthorn') almost to a fault will encourage you to join him, indeed even draw you into, dark areas of any room, regardless of other people in the room. He endeavors to make you his sole possession, as it is, that you become the total focus of his interest, which is precisely the seductive reason mostly involved in human women finding the desire, even need, of starting a romantic liaison with a vampire so appealing. Having another, even an other-worldly individual, show such interest and desire is an exciting intoxicant. This is a sharp knife edge to walk, always be careful!

Your first introduction and time spent together will end as eventfully as you can remember the next day. And as unimportantly as if it were all but a dream in someone else's life. And a yearning will remain for the moments you spent together. Your vampire attractor has your interest now.

And now that "Vlad" has piqued your interest in late-night activities, it's important to know the ins-and-outs of the human half of this cross-species dating match.

What To Expect

Vampires will often seem to be a tad on the narcissistic side, this is common as they are "survival first" oriented creatures. Yes, "Vlad" will be late for dates. Yes, he may even show up days late, not seeming to realize that he is days late, he having been on a feeding frenzy in some undisclosed (and oft unreported) location.

As he attempts to keep his "secret" from you expect some dishonesty from him. His answers to any type of question that require a personal accounting will be elusive, to say the least.

It's also likely that he will have many admirers. These can range from brothers of the 'vamphood' to sisters of the 'dark rites'. Don't be offended or jealous. These hangers-on are a part of the scenery and you'll always stand out from them. Just enjoy his company, ignore theirs.

Expect more 'things to do' type dates than food or meal oriented dates. Vampires don't eat much and often forget that humans need regular sustenance. Bowling is a popular date for vampires, mostly because of the availability of 24 hour bowling alleys than anything else. Surprisingly moonlit walks on the beach doesn't score on their list of popular date destinations. Not because of the moonlight but more likely the salt water, although this is unconfirmed.

Unless you live in a mega-opolis of night-time shopping malls forget going shopping unless it's anything but windows you want to see. Vampires and daylight just don't mix.

Preparing For Your First Date

The first date is the most critical. Once his initial attraction has been focused on you (and you're swooning with desire) you'll want to be sure to dress appropriately to keep the magic alive.

Your 'strigoi' (Romanian for vampire) will keep his distance, and maybe even keep on driving instead of picking you up, should you be wearing silver jewelry, be overly clothed (keep at least your arms uncovered) or have an undefeatable herbal fragrance on your hair or skin. Strigoi can detect these harmful items at a distance.

Wear natural fiber fabrics and keep to simple, unexcessive, fragrances if any at all. Natural touches and natural scents are what really drives a vampire's desire.

Your hair should be styled the same as when he last saw you. Surprisingly enough, with five heightened senses and the power of telepathy (depending on his pure-bloodedness) he may think you're not the same person if your hair is different from his memory of you.

Do not wear any jewelry. Your 'Prince of Darkness' will offer you a gift of something to wear, be it a necklace or earrings, at the end of your meal or some other opportune time.

Final Warnings

If at all you feel uncomfortable with his attentions, tell him. Vampires are incredibly self-centered and ignorant of the emotional needs of human women.

Should you feel dread or unease, let your senses lead you. This may keep you in the world of daylight. Remember that vampires are at the top of the food chain.

Don't be offended if he doesn't think to drive through Starbucks to get you a latte on the way home, it's just not in his nature. Again, he doesn't need to eat. Food.

Watch for the times of the year when vampires are most active in filling their bloodlust: April 23, the Feast of St. George and November 30, the Feast of St. Andrew, are renowned vampire event times. Daters are well cautioned to keep their house lights on and lock the doors tightly and do not, under any circumstances, invite their dates in for the evening or the day may end up being the last of the daylight days you'll see.

Lastly, should the attentions of your vampire romancer become unwanted, be sure to wear a ring of garlic cloves around your neck, carry a wooden cross and, most importantly, stay on hallowed ground!

 

(c) 2007 Robert Lee and cheerful attitude web design ltd. All Rights Reserved. By accepting and reading this article you agree that: You understand this to be an opinion and not professional advice, it is only to be used for personal entertainment purposes, you are solely responsible for any use of the ideas, concepts, and content

 

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