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How to Get Your Groove Back By Sarah Fielding (Lavalife columnist)

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If you've been out of the dating loop for a while, coming back can be a bit intimidating. But don't forget that dating is meant to be fun, and just like riding a bike, with a bit of practice you'll soon be back at it and popping proverbial wheelies. Our top tips will help ease you off the sofa and into the dating fast lane in no time.

Cut the Cord

While it's admirable and very civilized to remain friends with your ex, an old lover lurking in the background sends out the wrong signals to your prospective new dates. If you're going to get your dating mojo back, you need to be ruthless with old, going-nowhere relationships that linger. This means no walking the dog with your ex on Saturday morning, and no reality TV post-mortem phone calls mid-week either. Instead of falling back into old routines with old flames, cut the cord and step out as a hot new single ready for action.

You're Not Alone

One look around Lavalife's three sizzling and highly populated communities (Dating, Relationship and Intimate) will tell you that you're not alone. Look at your dating experiences as a new, exciting adventure in your life and enjoy yourself. You're free to see whoever you choose, when and where you like, so cherish your freedom and bask in the thrill of meeting new people.

Look Your Best

Sprucing up your appearance is a great confidence booster for those re-entering the dynamic world of dating. And while a new look can add oodles of self-assurance to a person, it pays to be wary of opting for an extreme overhaul. Dating confidence is all about being comfortable in your own skin. A new outfit, a new hairstyle, or even a new fragrance is all you need to shout to the world, "I'm hot and ready to date again."

Feel Your Best

Start a wild new hobby that you can throw yourself into -- it could be kickboxing, rock-climbing, fitness boot camp -- whatever. Feeling your best means a boost to your energy levels, increased fitness and improved self-confidence, all of which go a long way towards getting your groove back.

Rate Yourself

Write a list of 10 things that you really like about yourself -- from your appearance ( I have shiny, healthy hair ) to your skills ( I can burp the whole alphabet ) and your interests ( I am fascinated by ancient Egypt) . A little light-hearted soul searching is the perfect way to help get a clear perspective on yourself and what you offer prospective dates. This process can also help highlight areas of your life that you'd like to work on improving.

Write a Killer Profile

Repeat after me: I'm a lean, mean dating machine . Now, it's time to roll out the big guns and announce yourself to the dating world as a hot date waiting to happen. Give your dating profile a bit of a polish, adding a snappy, attention-grabbing opening line. Then update your Lavalife In My Own Words description to include some key points from your top 10 list, above. Add a new photo (or five) to your profile and you'll be ready for anything.

Date, Date, Date

The best way to tackle dating jitters is by immersing yourself in the Lavalife Dating (or Relationship or Intimate) community and really going for it. With your new profile and photo, you'll be positively dripping with date-ability, so get out there and flirt like there's no tomorrow. Now's the time to play the field, throw your Perfect Date list out the window and gorge yourself at the singles smorgasbord.

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Lavalife

 

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