Find The Best When You Expect The Best
With six billion other people sharing the planet with the relatively insignificant number of us who are reading this article, you would think that most of us would naturally intuit that men and women were designed to get along with each other. After all, how else did we all get here?
Yet, if you look around at some of the "dating advice" and "seduction training" that is popular nowadays-especially for the guys--you'd think that the opposite sex were the Viet Cong or even Al Qaida...only more mysterious and potentially dangerous.
Seriously, are we wanting to fill our lives with great women or launch the Tet Offensive?
Who can be sure? After all, when guys get together to learn how to divide and conquer...er...go meet women, it's almost universally called a "boot camp". And who cares if the concept of "Sarging" was named after a cat? It has a nice ring to it-at least in this context. Some writings go so far as to openly use military-inspired imagery.
And whatever is going on, it had better be a covert "underground" operation. If the women ever found out what was being clandestinely strategized, our top-secret mobilization would be rendered useless.
I wouldn't be a bit surprised if soon someone started marketing his or her latest and greatest seduction product as "recently declassified by the CIA". Actually, on second thought...too late.
Meanwhile, behind "enemy lines"-the whereabouts of which may be poetically summarized as the "No Man's Zone"-the latest recon reveals the insidious plot that the "Pinkos" (Emily would consider this a compliment if taken literally, by the way) are scheming. Basically, their plan is to get the Evil Male Empire to (gasp!) DEFECT to their side. And they have their ways of making us talk. And be more sensitive. And stop being so...well...masculine.
OK, that's enough. As much as I'm amusing myself to no end over here, my stomach can only take so much.
Here it is: We're never going to get anywhere with the opposite sex-especially the HIGHEST ECHELON thereof-if we can't friggin' stand them.
Granted, maybe it's not all that dire. My baseline opinion is that guys who dive headlong into the "pickup" community often end up participating in more of a live version of "Halo" then anything having to do with real relationships with women. Getting a bunch of digits and/or e-mails at a club and then comparing scores with your buddies at 2am sounds like a blast, frankly. But it's more like "laser tag with a liquor license" than anything relevant to attraction and seduction. Yet, become good at "pickup" and you basically don't have to worry about even getting alone with a woman ever again. So, then, it's actually not a "war on women" or anything. I think most guys like women. This is more along the lines of what does a dog do once he actually CATCHES the car he's chasing?
And that, gentlemen, is exactly as far as "paint-by-numbers" pickup game gets you. Welcome to the hidden issue at play here. The "real life video game" is a lot of fun. But that still leaves the women waiting for some men to actually care enough about THEM to show up.
As for the ladies, a female friend of mine once summed up popular "dating advice" for women quite well when she said, "I think all of that stuff is pretty much designed to help women find closure after they've been dumped." That was her words, not mine. Then again, having just typed them with my own hand pretty much makes them my words too, doesn't it?
Whatever happened to having confidence in the opposite gender? Did that go away with the pandemic rise in lack of confidence in OURSELVES that we see nowadays? Face it: two neuter creatures CANNOT become sexually attracted to each other. Neuter and spay your cats and dogs and they'll lay around the house staring at each other. Then they'll eat. Then they'll take a nap. YOU, on the other hand, don't necessarily have to live that lifestyle. You can experience the fantastic depth life offers when you take a chance and ENJOY the opposite gender because you EXPECT THE BEST from the opposite gender.
Is that too optimistic for you? Yeah, well...think like that and you may get burned here and there. After all, human nature transcends the boundaries of sexuality. But it still beats sitting around playing video games.
Scot McKay's dating strategies for those who refuse to settle for anything less than the ULTIMATE relationship are found here Stop by right now and grab a FREE e-book ($20 value) when you sign up for the X & Y Communications Newsletter, which is always packed with unique and practical dating tips.
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Scot McKay is the founder of X & Y Communications, a one-stop-shop for dating resources. He is the author of the book 'Deserve What You Want', and hosts the popular podcast series 'X & Y On The Fly' with his fiancée Emily. Sign up for the unique and entertaining newsletter here and receive a FREE GIFT.