When starting a new relationship, many women (and
men as well) tend to overlook some behaviors in their new partner that do not
bode well for the future. Then, down the road, comes the exclamation ‘If I had
As a Psychotherapist who has worked with mostly women and a few men in the
field of Domestic Violence, during counseling sessions we can always trace
back obnoxious and also dangerous character traits to the very start of the
Here are some ‘Red Flags' to watch out for in a new partner.
1) He makes decisions about where to go with little or no input from you.
2) He belittles your opinion when the two of you are alone and may call you
3) He makes disparaging remarks about you in front of others and may talk
about you as if you were not there.
4) He may be rough during love-making and make you engage in acts you do not
5) He does not want to spend time with your friends or family and insists you
socialize with his people.
6) He will not acknowledge your areas of expertise
and may put down what you do in the workplace - ignore any of your
7) He may openly flirt with other women and then accuse you of being jealous
when you object.
8) He gets angry and loses his temper over trivialities. Stays angry for a
long time and attempts to blame all arguments on you.
10) One of the main factors is that he comes
on very strong in the beginning of your relationship - sweeps you off
your feet - and wants an exclusive relationship too quickly. Many women
feel flattered at the intensity of the man's seeming need for an
immediate connection and consequently overlook the inappropriateness of
*This should not be confused with ‘love at first sight' where one or
both parties feel an instant connection - without any of the
There are many other factors that could be listed - but if the man in
your life begins displaying the above qualities - realize it will not
get better, only worse. He will likely be unwilling to discuss his
emotions openly and feel that women are the inferior sex.
If this describes your man, run - do not walk - out of his life. The
next step will likely be physical abuse.